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Distant corners - fools do chime
I pace the quiet corners of my mind,
Down the hall:
echoes of remorse softly chime.
I dance with the pages of words unsaid,
A heavy cloak
weight of apologies left unread.
I fantasise about your lips spilling;
“Sorry”,
I weave intricate tapestries,
Heartfelt words
whispered pleas,
Seeking solace;
“come back to me”
Each syllable a tender embrace,
Each sentence is a hopeful grace.
reality's harsh light breaks through--
fragments, just a few.
In this corner of tangled regrets,
Apologies are often met
With silence--
a distant gaze,
I linger on - to pass the days
I fantasise, of apologies.
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
neopoet
Mon, 2024-04-29 16:30
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
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Mary Beth Magee
Mon, 2024-04-29 10:40
Powerful!
I think we’ve all walked that particular corridor. You drew me into verse with your imagery. I particularly like “I weave intricate tapestries.” Such an apt description of the situation when we let our emotions wish for outcomes.
Check your spelling on the first line of the second stanza. Is that an alternate spelling of “fantasize” or am just in compulsive editor mode again?
Well done!
Thank you,
Mary Beth
Because your words have touched my heart,
I stopped to share a little part.
Be nice, supportive, kind to all
As we walk through this Poetry Hall.
professor jinx
Wed, 2024-05-01 05:38
Thank you so much! I
Thank you so much! I appreciate it :)
I'm Australian, we spell "fantasize" as "fantasise".
author commentMary Beth Magee
Thu, 2024-05-02 13:41
How lovely!
I love learn about how other places spell things...always interesting to see a word in a new way. Thanks for sharing the information.
Thank you,
Mary Beth
Because your words have touched my heart,
I stopped to share a little part.
Be nice, supportive, kind to all
As we walk through this Poetry Hall.
Geezer
Mon, 2024-04-29 11:33
Having a huge amount of time
Having a huge amount of time in living with and among strong women,
I have learned to respond to a fellow sufferer. Yes, they may indeed be sorry,
but, it will never pass their lips. Well, almost never; there has been a rare occasion or two...
however, that is a story for another time. You have a misspelling of fantasize,
but other than that your language is strong and heavy-hearted, I felt it strongly, [fellow sympathizer].
I sense a conversational tone about this as if it were lines in a play. Nicely done, ~ Geezer.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Obadiah Grey
Mon, 2024-04-29 13:26
Dearest errant colonial
Dearest errant colonial subjacent,,,,, *Ahem*
there is no "misspelling" of "fantasise" !
Obious.
Geezer
Wed, 2024-05-01 09:03
Forgive...
this errant colonial for not realising that it was a colloquial spelling, of an Australian set down in the morass of an increasingly turbulent so-called English communication. ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Obadiah Grey
Mon, 2024-04-29 13:36
"Distant corners" is a good
"Distant corners" is a good title,
you don't need the following "fools do chime"
its a touching piece.
Obi.