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Patricia
Patricia
Jul 01, 2024 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the challenge:

07/24 Falling For My Therapist

(Read More...)

Angel

I see you there glowing,

like an angel in a darkened sky,

gentle as I ever seen.

I bow my head before your eyes.

But alas, you are sleeping,

And your eyes are closed.

It’s just a figment of my imagination,

you were there you really were.

I see no sense in what you are.

To me you are the most wonderful creature,

and maybe you truly are an angel,

sent from God to guide me.

— Patricia, Jul 01, 2024

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

More from this author

Critiques

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

1 year 11 months ago

Hello

I liked this immensely, a nice soft read. A possible typo. Did you mean 'gentle' where you have 'gentile'? Alex.

Geezer

Geezer

1 year 11 months ago

I would choose...

to present this just a little differently, like so:

gentle as [I've] ever seen.

But your eyes are closed
you are sleeping.

comma: "you were there, you really were."

Nice stuff! ~ Geez.
.

Patricia

Patricia

1 year 11 months ago

Angel

Thank you for the critique and kind words.
Pat