This time
which should be marked
by comfort , safety and new love
anticipation as well as appreciation
of new life
is not to be

Instead
within a chamber marked by blood
discarded trash, feces and crud
nature's system is derailed
by the invasion of a womb
for the hopeful? naught but doom

Dead soilders crunch under feet
Where stained bricks and alleys meet.
Pass along the paper bag,
Spark up a jack, take a drag.
Dime bags sold from corner stores.
Addicts, dealers, pimps and whores.
Living, dying, day by day.
No time for sleep where I stay.
Daily hustle on the flow,
Torn flyers read, "Just Say No!"
Born to this, I'll never leave.
No way out that I perceive.

Hey,you
I’m pouring out my soul
A simple glass wouldn't do

I will intoxicate
Your emotions
Until my tears
Fall from your eyes

I will recite my fears
Until your palms
Feel like they're drowning

Don’t you ignore me
No, you will learn
What’s its like
To wish silence could speak

You will fall to your knees
As if every prayer
Is a missed call
On God’s phone

your verbal foreplay and
sweet voice
was too hard to
resist
I was "that wee bit special"
quite often you'd
insist

but not enough to win
your heart
not in the way that
mattered
I have to still your
sweetened words
before my heart
is
battered

you showed your love
for all to
see
and your heartfelt plea
brought tears
but as your words
sunk slowly in
they realised my
inner
fears

I want to peel off
my skin.
Dig deep until
bone scrapes against
my weapon of choice.

Pull back the flesh.
Yank apart elbows.
Knees.
Collarbones glued to shoulders.

Stringy muscles and
fat.

Leave the skeleton
hanging on the laundry
line
until my marrow
is dry.

god found me
what was God doing
when I was being conceived

I came out as
a man
or woman deceived

I don't know

what made God games play

to let me in this world

in this funny way

what am I

I do not know

how do you think

God would remember so

they say heaven does know

causes to causes
we rushed
drowned in the heartless
growth gathered about
the ruins

VENA AMORIS

your soul rode
thin robed

plasmapheresis

winter eyes full and
still
a crawling winter night
widths

Love like increments
fingers on a hip
lust sick

My only escape is inside.
Nothing is left, not even pride.
A sad clown, sulking in despair.
Lost in a thought, a dead man's stare.
No more joy in an act played out,
Drowning sorrow with bitter stout.
Lost it all, there is no healing.
Gun in hand, I paint the ceiling.

Another day opens its flower
revealing her heart to the sky 
that space eternal, dark. 

What specks of dust are we 
when measured in proportion to the whole
however small, our egos fill the all
all knowledge stored inside our brain, its busy fret
until one day its closing bud becomes
one again with all the matter of this universe. 

I wish I had
x-ray eyes
to see straight
through the
best disguise

I wish I had a heart
of steel--
you can't hurt if
you don't
feel

I wish my soul was
dark not light
maybe then I'd
hide from
sight

I wish my nature
was less
forgiving
for then I could
be anger
driven

I wish my skin
was rough
and tough
because for now
I've had
enough