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All Hands To The Pump (Cliche Workshop)
All Hands To The Pump
You keep me on the down low
Telling me that it's all good
And all is fair in love and war
But it ain't nothing but a chicken wing
Because too many cooks spoil the broth
Of your nasty little acid test
Your love is blind to my needs
And your rolling stone gathers no moss
You're free as a bird as you roam
Like a seven year itch
Taking only the icing on the cake
You think that love is as scarce as hen's teeth
But you're hot to trot a mile a minute
Saying "I'm game"
You don't know that silence is golden
Because you're rotten to the core
You think I'm a necessary evil
As the lesser of two evils
When you could keep your nose to the grindstone
And hit that ball and knock it out of the park
Knock the cover off the ball
With you it is age before beauty
You Can't see that my love is
Fresh as a Summer's rain
And deeper than the deepest ocean
Comments
Kailashana2
Thu, 2011-06-23 12:28
A mutual admiration society
A mutual admiration society forms.
~A
(Double check your caps.)
p.s. These workshops are SO MUCH FUN and gives us another chance to revisit one another, regardless of our original and/or changing impressions.
;-)
Candlewitch
Thu, 2011-06-23 12:33
Anna,
Thanks for that, I also misspelled a word! LOL.
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:03
Thanks!
I know what you mean... it is cringe-worthy! LOL!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Hooded Stranger
Fri, 2011-06-24 11:33
Bloody Hell
Cat,
Like Anna & Lou you made it look easy...I am most impressed. This has been a good exercise...and I doubt any of us will dare use a cliche again.
HS
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With all that I am and all that I could be, I walk this earth, yet nobody sees me.
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:05
Dear Dan,
Thanks! I choked on my own words, LOL!
always. Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
lou
Thu, 2011-06-23 16:25
Cat
Great stuff you make cliches seem cool.
Lou
Stand tall, be proud to be who you are, give the world the finger!!!!
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:07
Thanks, Lou!
You won't find this poem in any book! LOL!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2011-06-23 16:59
Cat
cliches used really wel
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:08
:)
Thanks, Barbara!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:11
Dear (((Ian)))
You are so good at them. I think you must have a book of cliches on hand! Or else you could write one yourself!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Race_9togo
Thu, 2011-06-23 19:50
Cat
Of all I have read, you'rs comes closest to being actually readable without that cringing "oh no you didn't" feeling.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:13
Dear Jim,
Thanks for the encouragement! It's hard to write a poem that bad, LOL!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Eduardo Cruz
Fri, 2011-06-24 00:28
damn girl this is truly good!
damn girl this is truly good!
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:15
LOL!
A really good bad poem? Is there such a thing or is it an oxymoron? LOL!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2011-06-24 00:34
really good
the best i read so far as the flow is well done
and easy to read
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:17
!!!
Thanks so much, dear Barbara!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Eduardo Cruz
Fri, 2011-06-24 11:57
Ian
big mouth Rat, let us brown nose if it's what we do best.
Your statement shows that inreality you're the champ of brown noseing. Damn you do it good. Hahaha!
Eddie
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
raj
Sat, 2011-06-25 03:32
Dearest Cat
from start to finish it is absolutely spot on as is expected of a pro...while i sit and absorb this learning experience....
much love..
raj (sublime_ocean)
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:19
Dear Raj,
You are far too kind.
love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
raj
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:49
Dear Cat
I am now eager to read your re-write...
much love...
raj (sublime_ocean)
Candlewitch
Mon, 2011-06-27 12:32
Dearest Ian,
You are too much, LOL! You have made this workshop a lot of fun.
love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Candlewitch
Wed, 2011-07-06 11:13
Thanks!
To everyone who read this and responded! Sorry I had to be gone for a bit due to an injury. I sprained my right wrist and was put into a brace. I'm right handed and trying to type with my left was a mess. So I adopted the hunt and peck method for a while,which got very tiresome and sore. I finally just stopped trying and nursed my wrist. I am back now, taking a break from the brace. I still won't be as active in neo poet as I had been. They say time wounds all heels...
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.