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Absence
Love isn't a burden
until it is gone
A failure of stone
I thought was forever
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Triskelion
Sat, 2021-12-25 12:58
Hi Michael Anthony
It's probably just me, but I get the first two lines and the third just escapes my reasoning. Was it meant to do that?
Thomas
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...so like my lost dreams...the flood
Michael Anthony
Sat, 2021-12-25 14:26
Thanks for stopping by Tri.
Thanks for stopping by Tri. The third line was intended to convey that we often take our loved ones (or lost loves...) for granted, and that they will always be there for us.
Cheers
Michael Anthony
Michael Anthony
Sat, 2021-12-25 14:29
Also, a lot of my poetry is
Also, a lot of my poetry is inspired by the brevity of haiku, sometimes this works to the poem's advantage, and sometimes I may miss the mark. Merry Christmas!
Cheers
Michael Anthony
Triskelion
Sat, 2021-12-25 15:24
Aah, I see
I was trying to apply weight measure to the word "stone". Cheers, and Merry Christmas to you as well.
Thomas
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...so like my lost dreams...the flood
Geezer
Sat, 2021-12-25 15:06
I got it...
right away! Good stuff! ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
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scribbler
Sat, 2021-12-25 23:50
hello
Brevity often requires the reader to think.......thanks for the headache lmao
Jackweb
Mon, 2021-12-27 15:43
Line three is the heaviest
It uncovers the heavy Metaphor in the poem. The impact of metaphor is to represent ideas through comparison. It allows poets to convey vivid imagery that transcends literary meanings , creates images that are easier to understand and respond to than literal language.
Simple verse but needs a poetic mind to break it apart.
Well written Michael Anthony
"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb