so low
I've crawled into a hole
well beneath
my dank, slimey soul

oh! dark is abandonment
and so cold,
the heart that put me here,
frozen, on hold

I don't like it
a great frustration
fighting it is futile,so,
I settle in for the duration

an interior light
keeps me sane (?)
an interior life,
there to mock, scoff, and blame

it is a crying shame
to say I'm OK
in this self made hole
where I've lain many a'day

splash
a poem
out of nowhere
plopped at my feet

shall I pick it up?
is it mine?
like a shiney dime
I'm not sure what to do

it was not assembled
on a production line
too fine
one of a kind
impossible to industriate

so,
what shall I do?

since no one is claiming it
I pick it up
dust it off
and hang it on the wall
(I think that's where one hides art)
hang it on the wall
until this is all straightened out

walking alone
pondering the map of my life

a hard edged night
air biting bitter
ceiling unlimited

with startling suddeness
nano-sparkles burst forth
out of the utter black

AVALANCHE!

chuncky blocks of memory
crashing
like boulders tumbling down a mountain
discrete packets
of doom and glory
failure and hope
pleasure and pain
storied in their original formats
relived in strikingly clear detail

mortified
I can't look away
there is no other place

we try to understand
without understanding
consciousness;
the creator and producer
of this greatest, fantastical,
spectacular of all time

"the grand illusion of something
instead of nothing"

to understand this illusion
we must first understand
the illusionist
since this can't be done
all understanding remains tentative

so enjoy the puzzle
while living the riddle
learn to love the enigma
that's all we get!

you'll get used to it!

patchouli mist
bluesy jazz
a small sphere of lamplight

I'm in a mood bubble
of my own making
I like it
and it's easy to set up

you, too, can do it
I suppose you already do
in your own fashion
just thought I'd share my recipe with you

make sure all the pets are in
nothing scheduled for tomorrow
take a few tokes (not too many)
then, kick back, mellow out

chill for hours

do not read the rest of this
and definitely,
do not think of elephants
when not doing so

but beware of the danger
Oh!, I forgot to mention
this may be dangerous

have you forgotten the line
about not thinking of elephants?

well, don't not think of them
if you choose
but, it will probably spoil the poem
though, now I'm starting to think
we've already passed that point

so......,

virtually extinct
old school
old fashioned
now, just old
but once they were giants
a breed apart
ruff and ready
smart and resouceful
they did stuff
big stuff
hard
fast
got it done
making plans
setting goals
on the go
but,alas!
they are no more
gone,in essence,
like film noir,
John wayne,
or the Tuskaloosa air men
they just don't make 'em
like that anymore
but, I keep hoping
there is a place
a forgotten wilderness

she hinted
I'm not good with hints
most times don't even know
I'm being hinted at
that's an odd expression, I think
or a funny little gesture
but, she is a little quirky
I leave it at that
then the shan hits the fit
sort of
she doesn't turn into a monster
or anything like that, but, she is ticked

"you forgot, after all my reminders"

I never recognized even one of them
this hint thing is infuriating!

wandering the world
seeking an empty throne
be-headed, home soon

.
when confronted with the ineffable
intelligensiacs make up words
thoughtlessly thinking
this will elucidate
but this only compounds
befuddlement
leaving all, groping
an impassable terrain
of bewilderment,
brain strained
now, themselves making up their own words
new invectives
...of obvious intent!

should someone tell them?

leave the ineffable alone
accept, and heave the inevitable,
regrettable
...sigh!