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who i am

who do you want me to be?
tell me and i’ll become her.
i can play it all.
i’ll read from my script
merely a puppet pulled by your strings.
i’m afraid of rejection,
have you figured that out yet?
i’ll play my part
to keep you along
until i hold the upper hand.
i want you to want me
unless i decide i no longer want you.
who am i really?
that’s for me to know.
for you, i’m whoever you want.
unhealthy, yes, but who the fuck cares?
at least i am loved
for now.
at least i feel like i have “my person.”
i don’t know who i am.
do i exist solely to gain your attention?
i would say affection, but i no longer need that much.
i want to be free
and i want to be loved.

Review Request (Intensity): 
Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Review Request (Direction): 
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content


I have no concerns about the piece of work, other than the use of all lower-case letters. The idea is not a new one, but you have made it seem so. Nice job of internal conversation. ~ Geezer.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you! I wrote this poem late at night and wasn’t thinking to capitalize my words, but I’ll definitely do that moving forward :)

author comment

I found these lines rather sinister:

i’ll play my part
to keep you along
until i hold the upper hand.

not good, for a healthy relationship... but I like the poem.

*regards, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Hi, thank you for your comment! I definitely agree that that is not a good mindset for a healthy relationship. This was a poem written out of anger late at night, thankfully not how I act in real life :)

author comment

hello hippiemoon. very nice poem.


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