Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

What is

Hope is when a stranger holds your hand and offers help
When family abandons you
Hope is seeing the beautiful sunlight and basking in its warmth
Hope is not seeing the darkness but only the light.

Hope is the first breath that we take when we enter the world
Hope is a heart with emotional pain struggling to heal
From different types of abuse
Yet the giving of the love to fill others
Hope is believing in the goodness of others and caring for the greater good
Hope is life and words untold.

Hope exists as long as life exists
Neither cannot do without the other
It soothes the love from deep within
It stands, it holds and it stays.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

the premise of what hope means.
I think you did a good job, but see a couple of things
that I would change. I would leave off any punctuation
from the ends of the lines, especially the semi-colons
you don't need them. Change the tense of the word [entered]
making it enter. Use [One] cannot do without the other
or "Neither can do without the other."

Just a couple of things I see to make this a little smoother.
Of course, you are not bound to use the little advice
that I or anyone here give you; you can certainly make up your own
mind and answers to these little hiccups. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Hi Geezer thank you for the corrections and for giving feedback on this piece. It is greatly appreciated.

Candice Vitalien
"Keep glowing even if no one can see your light.
For among the hidden stars on the darkest night
Someone will look up and behold
The flickering hope; words untold;
Strength and Honour my Warriors! "

author comment

I have made the necessary changes.

Candice Vitalien
"Keep glowing even if no one can see your light.
For among the hidden stars on the darkest night
Someone will look up and behold
The flickering hope; words untold;
Strength and Honour my Warriors! "

author comment

Both opening lines of the first two stanzas are stand alone masterpieces. The last stanza wraps the thought up pretty neatly. Everything here is truth.

“Hope is when a stranger holds your hand offers help”

This has happened to me. It’s important to my healing. My loved ones didn’t abandon me but I wasn’t hearing them. It had to come from the compassion of a stranger. That’s what rekindled my hope.

Beautiful and true, every word,
Tim

Hi Tim we both shared the same sentiments as to how we view the word "hope" and its meaning to us. Thank you for reading and sharing your perpsective.

Candice Vitalien
"Keep glowing even if no one can see your light.
For among the hidden stars on the darkest night
Someone will look up and behold
The flickering hope; words untold;
Strength and Honour my Warriors! "

author comment

Hello, Warrior Princess!
Wonderful description(s) of hope! It is everything, as your poem suggests. What a beautiful concept that hope is the first breath we take when we enter the world. That seems to be the very foundation of hope! I agree with Geezer about completely removing punctuation, especially since each line starts with a cap. Each line stands alone as its own refreshing affirmation!
Thank you!
Lavender

Hi Lavender thank you for taking the time to read this piece and sharing your views. Definitely, I have to stop adding in that punctuation, I keep forgetting but will pay particular attention. Geezer did point it out to me before. Thanks much.

Candice Vitalien
"Keep glowing even if no one can see your light.
For among the hidden stars on the darkest night
Someone will look up and behold
The flickering hope; words untold;
Strength and Honour my Warriors! "

author comment

I think you summed it up beautifully! So many things, small and large give us hope and renew our faith that things will improve and that there is still good in the world/society. Well done!

~RoseBlack~

Roseblack thank you for reading this piece, sure will join in and give it a try.

Candice Vitalien
"Keep glowing even if no one can see your light.
For among the hidden stars on the darkest night
Someone will look up and behold
The flickering hope; words untold;
Strength and Honour my Warriors! "

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.