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Thy Rose

Thy rose
Conceited
Now transformed to egoism
Self absorbed mannerisms
Shape thy rose

They see this rose
And smell thy narcissism
Stench filling the room

Thy rose
Thinks of gold and valuables
Instead of work
Thy rose wilted
Due to thy rose’s pride

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Welcome to Neopoet, This is an amazing post for a first submission.

The rot in character when one is obsessed by that which isn't truly important. image, status, that's what I got from your write, and it's so true at the end of the day its what's in one's character and heart that's truly important.

I am the Director of Community Outreach if you have anything you need, or questions answered I am happy to help. I truly look forward to reading your poems this is an absolute cracker!

Kind Regards Seren.

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

welcome to Neopoet, it is very nice to meet you.if you need any help, or have questions about the site please ask. any of the advocates will be glad to help you with what they can. this is a very deeply profound poem. an excellent first poem to post!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I've read this several times now, beautifully phrased. Alex

The nature of beauty along with countless other essences enforced upon us by society and the media all must be shattered and rebuilt a fabulous first poem thanks for sharing

Excellent free verse. Great cadence and ample room to breathe.

Well done and welcome,
Tim

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