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My Bloody Valentine
Take this burnt rose from upon your lips
The thorns will only hurt a bit
Crimson regrets disembogue
As your color dips
Take this knife from out your chest
Twist the edge like your spoken word
Wounds may heal with proper care
But verbal evidence lingers in the air
Take this kiss upon your last breath
My name in your mouth for eternal rest
Your favorite flavor at best
I'll love you forever, my bloody Valentine
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Geezer
Sun, 2023-02-05 13:44
Oooooh...
this reads like the beginning of a "Killer" poem! He wants, no, needs, one of these lines for himself! We love it! ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
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RoseBlack
Sun, 2023-02-05 14:42
I am so glad
Killer approves. He understands Valentine's Day is my least favorite holiday!
~RoseBlack~
author commentCandlewitch
Sun, 2023-02-05 15:54
dear Carrie,
a little blood, no...scratch that, make it a lot of blood on V-Day is expected, at least in my book. one of the worst days in the book of holidays! your poem is in stages of brutality... I Love it!
*ever eddy
* hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
RoseBlack
Sun, 2023-02-05 15:57
Thank you Cat
I thought you might like this! Something about the whole necrotic erotic death of my Valentine....
~RoseBlack~
author commentRosewood Apothecary
Sun, 2023-02-05 16:08
There she is
Now this is Rose Black. You know how I feel about when you murder people. I do believe you’re about as strong a poet at dark poetry as we have here, maybe Eddy Styx.
Well done,
Tim
RoseBlack
Sun, 2023-02-05 16:47
Thank you Tim
For such high praise! I have learned much from you and value your critique. Glad you enjoyed!
~RoseBlack~
author commentSeren
Mon, 2023-02-06 10:31
Dear Carrie
You've cast your spell I'm caught and held.
If feels and reads like a chant in a dark temple.
This is probably one of my favourite poems of yours I think it's darkly gorgeous
Love and hugs Jayne xox
“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats
RoseBlack
Mon, 2023-02-06 11:58
Thank you Jayne
I am so glad you like it and thank you for the high praise!
~RoseBlack~
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