I'm not going to call you by your full username, because no one is pointless, and I hope you will believe me about that.

What a powerful concept. I think hair has held special meanings throughout history. My own journey of self discovery and identity through my hair has been tumultuous, to say the least. As a child I thought I was ugly and the fact that my long hair was the only thing anyone ever complimented me on was all the proof I needed that this was true. Now as an adult, I've had short hair for about 13 years and buzzed short hair for about 7 years. I think the amount of mistreatment and mis-gendering I've gotten from having short hair has been more than the compliments I got as a child. But I love my hair, so I let it go.

I really like how your poem speaks to those ways we might use our hair, like any part of us or any accessory really, to hide or show parts of ourselves, but in the end, it is just something we perceive about ourselves because the person with no hair still holds their feelings back. I think it's also interesting that the man's short hair serves to show his emotions, even though boys and men are often taught to hold their emotions in and not show them (they are taught that boys/men shouldn't cry, they should "man up", etc.). The pattern of she-he-she in the stanzas also works well, I think because we get a chance to really see the contrast between what having hair could represent for the people of the poem and how different it might be for people with no hair (but again how its just something we imagine: our hair as our armor to protect us from the judgement of the world).

Clearly, your poem has really made me think a lot! So I hope you don't mind if I make a few suggestions. You definitely don't have to make any of the changes I suggest; they are just ideas to inspire you if you decide to revise.

A few little typos:

With all there beauty and grace --> "there" should be "their"
Her feelings she tries to hind --> "hind" should be "hide"
She's loosing her mind --> "loosing" should be "losing"

Next, because the poem is so short and the words are so potent, I think it is important to use words to the best effect, to chose them wisely. I think you could take the poem to the next level by using some different words to open the lines instead of beginning with she/her or he/his over and over.

For example, line 2 could be something like "mane-like/luxurious (pick one) hair flows through the air" and that one change would also give a great image of what the hair looks like. Similarly, line 6 could be something like "cropped/flimsy (pick one) hair just sits there" and that one change would give a great image of what the hair looks like. Same with line 11, which could read as something like "Scalp is bare instead." Some changes like these would help break up the repetition of she/her and he/his and develop the imagery of the poem as well.

Hope you don't mind these suggestions! Looking forward to reading more of your work.

By the way, Welcome to Neopoet.

Kelsey

I do agree with Kelsey about your chosen identity. This poem also made me think which clearly implies that it is not pointless. I am sure you will take Kelsey's suggestions as an objective critique in her personal capacity as well as her role as an Advocate Coordinator.

Besides being looked at as a style statement I do believe that there is a distinct connection between hair and self confidence.
.................

God only made a few perfect heads. He hid the rest with hair lol. The last stanza is powerful in its statement of how little hair means compared to the true individual. BTW welcome to Neopoet....stan