Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

ALIVE

Leaves stampede across the ground
fleeing from the winter cold
they scurry with a rustling sound
as last days of the year unfold

They'll each end their sprint somewhere
some might fetch up on a log
others lift into chill air
perhaps they'll land in a deep bog

This winter wind cuts to the bone
turning sedge fields into seas
little wonder I'm alone
few would brave such cold brisk breeze

I fill my lungs with each deep breath
and ignore aches of old stiff bones
traversing this season of death
through forests where the pine trees moan

The few birds overhead near tumble
as they dip and swerve and dive
through gales that make the bare limbs rumble
what a day to be alive!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 

Comments

A great theme of bouncing leaves, wind blown to their own eternity.
A feeling of being alive amidst the recycling of our foliage.
Here we have in our milder fall worms that drag numerous leaves into the ground, funny to see them sticking there proud in their death, knowing they will feed the Earth again..
Good write I enjoyed the read, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I was walking along the other day and just realized how a cold wind makes one feel alive lol. Thanks for the visit...................stan

author comment

didn't read beyond the title
thank god you are...

loved

I'll be sure to notify all on site when I schedule croaking lmao.................stan

author comment

ignore aches of old stiff bones.....

keep ALIVE
still
you are a young man
must know counting beads
at least up to 100

in USA and Canada
snow preserves the human skin and nerves
they all live far longer
ladies rarely die
till they are over 90
and you know why...

loved

If old is how one feels there are days when I'm 40 and others when I'm 140 lol.............stan

author comment

lovely nature poem can feel the chill enjoyed x

I'm pleased you liked it and happy you dropped by...........stan

author comment

You created atmosphere and then took us on a chilly brisk walk ... It was 40 degrees here today I wish I was there in the cool ... A great poem I thoughly enjoyed

Love Jc xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Yeah, I expect this came as a relief for ya'll down yonder where it's mid-summer. Appreciate your visit and you take care...................stan

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.