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We Left Are Mark

We Left Are Mark !

It was starting to rain,

That's when the acorns' fell

Next a slight ring of the bell,
Yet the door frame was still marked...
With a light silver streak;
Many faces in the crowd

One isn't accustomed to having a fancy bizarre
Suddenly there was a very loud noise !
Carry on out on the patio,
First a big black crow...

Then silence had filled the scene,
What ever happened to all those long nose pliers ?
With those pan handler's
All of them fancy liar's !
Yet we have become much happier to a quite different approach,

Gone are all those prodigal days when you have a fight with the soap on the rope,
Yet it doesn't quite matter who you are...
Perhaps one last stop at my local bar ?
We left our mark down at the funeral parlor,

Still a poor man begs for another dollar ?
By Mario William Vitale

© 2009 Mario William Vitale (All rights reserved)

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
Editing stage: 

Comments

welcome to Neopoet, chevyvent! it is very nice to meet you! I hope that you will find many hours of happy reading, writing and critiquing other poets work here.
first of all, the title: "We Left Are Mark" shouldn't it be: "We Left Our Mark"? that makes more sense to me.

could you explain these lines to me:

Perhaps one last stop at my local bar ?
We left our mark down at the funeral parlor,

I don't understand them. which is probably my fault.

respectfully, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

has many a typo
I suppose
she will remedy it quickly
let her come and see
Catswitch
On this site
we must create confidence
on all poets new and old
let us not only cajole
one might get a feeling
one is on parole

well as you say
may be its only you

i add on may be
lovedly also
lonely yeah only

"no more fighting with the soap on the rope"
seventies my poet friend!
Nixon...Watergate...liberty for all...
sans the cities burned...riots...
long court cases...
The Hard Rain Fell
didnt it..

what would Jefferson Airplane sing
about this electrion and fan base
All texting away in their name brand
fancy clothes!
driving home not together in their
vw van microbus the but prius
for a pit stop at the Starbucks!
ha!!
What would Guthrie had thought
and Dylan of course faded
proper..

soon they might Ban Born in the
USA as it is derogatory to those
emigrating like the had the anti
irish songs of the eighteen hundreds
when Protestants and Presbyterians
were strong!

Your voice is fast paced...Love the
word use and cryptic clatter of
this speed...

its like teletype...
"This just in"...
poetry run off the mimeograph
rushed to the street
When the Average Joe was not
stuck with his nose to his tablet
chasing Pokemans..

Thank U
very much!

Mr Esker!

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