Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

The 'Rapist'...

He had outfoxed the stupid cops
Was chased across the land
He felt he was the very tops
So many dying by his hand

But now, he stood with his back
Up against the wall
Killer says "Hey there, Jack
I've outdone them all

I've tracked you down, my dear boy
You don't know what you've cost me
But it really gives me joy
I'll finally set you free

How do you think that you will do
With a man that will fight back?
I like knives as much as you
Come on, what do you say Jack?

"Yes, I'll duel with you a bit
And still make my train
I've already got my ticket
To me, it's all the same

He lunged at 'Killer' took a slice
But his blade cut air
'Killer' said; That wasn't nice
But I guess that it was fair

They danced and whirled, came together
Tried to catch the other by surprise
The 'Rapist' wondered whether
This fight were really wise

The man, began to tire now
He was looking for an out
Sweat was dripping from his brow
He wasted breath to shout

Why do you care, what is your part?
I don't understand
"I care because, I've got a broken heart
Broken by a rapist's hand"

"To my departed brother Tim
I've made a solemn vow
That I will not break to him
And, I'm going to kill you now"

He did a fancy pirouette
His grace was such a sight
The 'Rapist' couldn't follow it
His eyes went wide with fright

'Killer's' knife went in so smooth
Ripped up through his chest
The man was struck by the move
Killer's Bowie did the rest

This fight was watched by a crowd
It really was a thriller
They heard the rapist nice and loud
As he fessed up to 'The Killer'

Time was wasting, the train was near
Young 'Killer' fled the scene
He guessed the law would soon be here
He knew what that would mean

But as he boarded on the train
Killer heard them say
"That man there? He was insane
The other guy? He went down that way"

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
First Killer in a while, he's been out hunting.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

in footsteps of snowman
now ye
be

Glad you stopped by. Killers back!
~ Geez.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment

Too bad Killer won't visit a few choice senators lol. You need a bit of editing to smooth this out but the story of the knife fight was riveting

I've been editing along the way. I lost the first three stanzas last night, through my ineptness and had to rewrite them, so it's been a struggle to match what I said in the rest of it. Slowly getting there. ~Gee.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment

Like I told Stan, I lost the first three stanzas last night while trying to post and have been editing and rewriting them all morning. I'll fix it in a little bit. Thanks again, ~ Geez.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment

I thought the Southern justice, or frontier justice meted out was approiate. I was glad to read the ending, and the demise of the rapist.

One of my daughter’s was raped when she was 14. She is dealing with it to this day (age 39 now), and effectively, alto she has some bad days still. I am proud of her.

I can’t read or talk about rape much, and I would have stood in the killer’s place voluntarily.

Strong piece, this.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I guess that you might call it Southern or pioneer justice, but to 'Killer', it is a matter of taking out the bad guys. He follows murderers and rapists across the world to mete out justice in cases where they are multi-offenders that are so slippery that the authorities can't seem to catch them. He didn't take any of the body to cook and eat this time, due to the way the incident took place. I'm sorry that your daughter had to go through that, but glad that she is dealing with it [effectively]. Many victims don't manage to and suffer terribly. Thank you for your read and comments. ~ Geez.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment

So many dying by his hand
So many hurting by his hand

A rapist does not necessarily bring death but certainly hurt.
It is so close to the title that it kinda stands out to me.
Another great round for KiIler though.
Mark

THE MARK
.
If you take the time to read a poem then take the time to let the author know you were there. Study it and form an opinion as well, even if it means going back to it more than once. That is basic critique, what Neopoet is all about.

the guy is a murderer too, although I failed to make it clear. You are right, I made the change. Thanks for pointing it out. Yeah, Killer got his ire up because of hearing about a serial-rapist and murderer, that the police just couldn't catch. Glad you liked this latest exploit of Killer. ~ Geez.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment

Hi Killer,

I've been away for a very long time....and find your 'Killer' is still on the loose!

So, help me out here...

I liked the story and pace...but the very last line confused me.

Ells

is meant to show that the people who watched Killer take this guy out, were sympathetic to his cause and pointed the police in the wrong direction. Like the old saying: "He went that-a-way!" I went back to see your writes and how I commented. Yes, Killer is still here, taking out the trash. Hope you stick around and do some writing. ~ Geez.
.

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.