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THIS LEAF FALLS (HERBSTSTURM)

This leaf falls
And is flattened to the ground.

Imprinted on the pavement
By a dozen booted feet
At once defined and later, now with ribs
And skeletal remains,
Competing with the sticky wrappers
And tin cans,
It slowly fades to dust
And blows away on the
Gusting autumn wind.

This leaf was sapful in its prime,
A verdant flag of spring’s surprise
And summer’s scented deck.

Beribboned on this tree’s mast
It sails, obedient and unthanked,
To autumn’s fateful end,
Unknowing, yet, the fate befalling all
That try to hide from icy winter’s thrall.

This leaf once gave succour to a mighty oak
That knew naught of the part it played
In this oak’s mighty cause,
Nor felt the wrench that stripped it
Of its life when autumn gales
Called time on its brief life
And sped it on to winter’s grip,
Its sap now dripping
From a terminal wound
On ground which men once tilled,
Where milk was churned,
And summer’s stubble burned.

This leaf meanders drunk.

Bereft of succour from that mighty trunk
As in the stillness of a dead man’s fall,
Its sails, now wings, dance in the eddies
Of a sullen sky, so quiet and cold.

So desperate in its meagre wisps
To keep its height above the clouds
That threaten death from every squall
It spins and spins but then surrenders
To its only fate
Knowing well that when it hits the ground
The sound it makes will be as bones
That clatter in the charnel house
As autumn’s auburn sun consumes
And autumn’s gales sound out
Their melancholy tunes.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Dedicated to all the poor squaddies who have to fight the wars that are created by powerful men.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Once I read your last words, I understood completely! A fitting metaphor for the bodies thrown to the wind, in war. Somber and
a well thought out theme that fits both the season and the day of remembrance. Nice job! ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

This was inspired by watching leaves fall from the Plain trees outside the Cenotaph in London (UK) and seeing the skeletal remains of the leaves imprinted on the pavement after they had been walked on.

author comment

You made the lines bloom and sprout with a true revelation. The words were scattered with flowers of elegant poetry as the scattered among the waves of the letters. The pulsating pulse of opulent pen lasted with beauty and splendor.
.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

Thanks for the comment Jackweb

author comment

You made the lines bloom and sprout with a true revelation. The words were scattered with flowers of elegant poetry as the scattered among the waves of the letters. The pulsating pulse of opulent pen lasted with beauty and splendor.
.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

A beautiful, yet haunting poem. I was not familiar with the German title. I found it meant "Autumn Storm", is that correct? Solemn throughout, an echo of silence in the final lines.
Thank you,
Lavender

Thank you for your comments. I prefer "autumn gale" but autumn storm is just as good. It is the title of a book about WW2 which is an account of some of the terrible battles that took place in France Belgium and Holland in the autumn of 1944.

author comment

When I read this it reminded me very strongly of the bodies of the poor KIA soldiers of both sides of the Ukraine-Russia war, already flattened and buried by shelling and the boots of those still fighting, and the so-called 'leaders' who force the Russians into battle that they don't want, or really understand.
So you got it down pretty much, and I didn't have to read your last words, although it was a good idea to include them.
Good stuff. I have no criticism, just appreciation.

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

You are right - it is about all those poor ba****ds who have to do the fighting. It doesn't matter who they are. I deliberately added the title "Herbststurm" (German for Autumn Gale) for that very reason.
I see you are Scottish so you may well be familiar with Elvis Costello's "Oliver's Army" lyrics - a song which brings tears to my eyes every time I play it. Reminds me of my old Dad every time.

"Oliver's army is here to stay
Oliver's army are on their way
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today "

author comment

Every word is perfect. The layers are thick in metaphor. Great job.

Tim

It's quite a long poem for me - T S Eliot's words always ring in my ears (Little Gidding) so I usually try to be a man of few words - none of them long.

And every phrase
And sentence that is right (where every word is at home,
Taking its place to support the others,
The word neither diffident nor ostentatious,
An easy commerce of the old and the new,
The common word exact without vulgarity,
The formal word precise but not pedantic,
The complete consort dancing together)
Every phrase and every sentence is an end and a beginning,
Every poem an epitaph

author comment
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