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How Long Will I Bleed?

Submitted by Kristen H. on Sat, 2024-03-02 21:46

I thought
it would be easy
to let you go

My walls stood proud
Shielding me the whole time

I thought
maybe
letting you go
wouldn't hurt

But here I am
writing about you
while my heart
aches

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
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Comments

neopoet

Sun, 2024-03-03 03:50

neopoet's picture
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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

This poem effectively captures the emotional struggle of trying to let go of someone despite the pain it causes. The use of short, simple lines conveys a sense of vulnerability and raw emotion. However, consider exploring more vivid imagery or metaphorical language to enhance the depth of the emotions expressed. Additionally, try to vary the structure of the poem to create a more dynamic flow and engage the reader further. Overall, this piece shows promise in its emotional honesty but could benefit from further development in terms of imagery and structure.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Alaethia D

Sun, 2024-03-03 08:55

Alaethia D's picture

I know this feeling, and I'm sorry you have the experience to know it too. You've done so beautifully. Thank you for sharing. <3

Kristen H.

Sun, 2024-03-03 10:04

Kristen H.'s picture

Thank you for your lovely comment! I appreciate your feedback! :)

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