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A Beautiful Life Going Waste (APRIL CONTEST)

I am wasting this beautiful life
sleeping all day all night
the snows keep me indoors
as I am not independent
but this laps top befriends me
more than does my own kith and kin
i reveal my inner self to the world
far and wide
and within my shell of loneliness
i slide
i can't that hide

a lovely dog they give me as a present
in this self wrought prison
I think tis the best present
as words flow out of me
like the Niagara
which also now has been rendered solid
if you want to melt my words
do use a candle.

AND AS SONNETIZED BY JUDY

I’m wasting here this beautiful free trip
I sleep the day away, and then all night
the cold and snows contain a certain nip
it seems I’m not immune, now, to their bite

I’m weary, through each day I seem to slide
I struggle with the fear and I am torn
within my shell of loneliness I hide
in this, my self-made prison, I’m forlorn

but see - my lap-top has befriended me
as too, a dog – ‘twas gifted by my kin -
they help reveal my inner self and free
the thoughts that seek attention from within

to melt my words, use candles and be kind
for, as they flow from me, my soul’s entwined

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
My perhaps the best poem on Neo since my birth here.
Editing stage: 
Contest: 

Comments

Ah, found your poem, lovedly. Good one, deserves first prize. Did the sonnet go as well? I love it.
Congrats!

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

This is one of my best poems and now it has to be judged by the sole APRIL'S judge ,
Hope he too likes it
If you read the original poem with comments you will understand what I mean
You need to SEARCH THE original title .

Hope you should have no trouble doing that
Thanks

author comment

for your kindness
It's been long time since
the Niagara froze
and
I switched over to poetry from prose
many would love it I suppose

lol

author comment

all neos

author comment

I just had to let you win with this one lol Great write young one so you cant recall when Niagara Froze.
It was a lovely sight in 1930 and there were more conversions to religion in that time than ever before.
Now I have to go on another cruise but with this Corona thing around all cruises have been cancelled, so you are really rubbing it in lol.
Well done see what happens next month ..
Yours as always Ian ..

Words can build a nation

I AM AWAITING FOR MY FOURTH-- CORRECTION 5TH WIN
This time you can contest also Ian
I will win through the hair of my skin
where on my teeth
LOL

THANKS for letting me WIN MAY 2020

author comment

oh my! your first stanza is amazing full of truth of what it is like to be alone or feel so, even when we are around others.
lovely second stanza that is also so true at this moment a dog can really give a lease of life to any human in any curcamtance "beautifully done" as for your sonnet "well im a bit jealous" i would love to write one someday

Thank you...Teddy

for your wonderful comments
like wise in the original 2015 poem
the leading NEO poets lent a WIDE hand
and
the Sonnet was the creative mind of Judy
who inspired and helped me
to become a poet of this site
hope I AM UP TO YOUR LEVEL OF EXPECTATION
Thanks

author comment
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