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Lennon probably...

Lennon Probably…

I offered direction but no one followed,
wrote a truth pill but no one swallowed.
It felt as though your heads had been hollowed
Screaming family’s with coffins, hearts sorrowed

If I were here today,
I’d probably end up crying

Get off your knees there’s no time to pray
we got to keep asking why us, why still today?

I heard the questions asked back in sixty nine
will we ever get away from mobsters and crime?
can we stop that money dollar making swine?
even though I made this country mine
it doesn’t mean were all doing real fine.

If I were here today
I’d probably end up crying

I told you then those politicians were lying
It’s only the poor soldiers who end up dying
you can’t understand why they kept on denying
well if your mind don’t work then you just stopped trying

if I were here today
I would probably end up crying…

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Maybe shooting a bit high when I mention Lennon...
Editing stage: 

Comments

I think that this poem is an effective comment on how things are, and reads smoothly. I think Lennon would do more than cry.

good stuff.

Lou

Stand tall, be proud to be who you are, give the world the finger!!!!

Thank you, i just wonder what he could have written if he'd lived until the present day. Thank you again for your comments . Love Roscoe..

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment

Maybe not change the world, but maybe they could've shaped it for the better. Thank you for your comments and suggestions, i have made some changes. Love Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment

I agree with every line. Well written, Roscoe, I can't find anything in it I would change. Well done.

Ian

TIME FLIES LIKE AN ARROW, BUT FRUIT FLIES LIKE A BANANA

Thank you for your comments Ian. Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment
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