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" M O O N " by ; itzhak bareket .

                     moon
      new  gold   moon
    high  on  the  sky
 like  a  well  done  croisson
     for  breakfast   in   Paris
             wellcome  !

    i    missed  you
    i   want  you   soon  soon
    as    before
    you   remember ?
   when   you    like   an   yellow     melon
         there  ,
   high    on   the    sky
        of     Manhattan
   shined   just   for   us
       she  and  me  .

   it    happened
   in   a   hot   summer  night,
  it was   a  splendid ,full   moon  light
       no   wonder   that   we felt  in   love
             she  and  me   .
   
    could    all   this  again  be
           my  dear   croisson
       yellow     melon   ? 
— itzhak bareket, Jul 13, 2010

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Country/Region: ISR

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Critiques

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

15 years 10 months ago

Hello

I find one word titles to be very powerful. Language use is good except for a few mistakes: high (on) the sky [in] and when you like (an) yellow melon [a] the pacing is good and the theme does appeal to me. It is a unique poem. Always, Cat