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M
magics02
Jun 06, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

If I Could

If I could chase away your tears
run away some of your fears
how would it be just then,
would you still feel alone my friend

If the sun didn't shine
and the clouds stayed near
would you still be sad
may I embrace you dear

If I told you I cared
would you believe in me
my arms reaching out
to hold you tenderly

If it's your time to cry
someday you'll know why
just cry those tender tears
wash away the many fears

If the rains come down
always remember too
the rainbow above shines
a haven  for you


mms 6.05.10

— magics02, Jun 06, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: USA - Florida, USA

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Critiques

SH

shirley harrison

16 years ago

lovely poem!

Dear Mona, written with beautiful thoughts! shirley harrison
M

magics02

16 years ago

Thank you Annie

No the ending being the rainbow to guide the the darkness of someones day. That is the ending short and sweet. Thank you for the comment Mona
lou

lou

16 years ago

hi

lovely thoughts lou xx
M

magics02

16 years ago

Skip skip skip to my Lou, my

Skip skip skip to my Lou, my darling, YOu remember that tune. We should play name that tune on Saturday night like we did with this past weekends game, I thought it was great and it had my mind all over the place. LOL thanks for coming in. I hope you got some rest the next day. Love Mona xxoxo
lou

lou

16 years ago

mona

I do remember that tune , the game was a lot of fun , even though no one seemed to understand it lol. lou xx
M

magics02

16 years ago

Lou

Skip skip skip to my Lou, my darling, YOu remember that tune. We should play name that tune on Saturday night like we did with this past weekends game, I thought it was great and it had my mind all over the place. LOL thanks for coming in. I hope you got some rest the next day. Love Mona xxoxo
hobo

hobo

16 years ago

nice work my friend

This is nice work my friend, my favorite lines are If it’s your time to cry someday you’ll know why just cry those tender tears wash away the many fears I think sometimes we just need a good cry to clear out things. nice read
M

magics02

16 years ago

Thank you for the visit

ANd oh those stars that shine on my page. LOL I am glad you liked this one Hobo and will catchup later friend. Peace Mona
M

magics02

16 years ago

three strikes and your in

.thanks for the visit anyhow Yeah I wrote this for all the sad and depressed in the world today. I appreciate the comment dont worry about the star bangled stars, it's not that important but I do know you see something in here to be changed, care to share? I may earn your two other stars or maybe I won't. LOL either which way glad you stopped in as I see you have not paid me a visit in a while, long as it does not provoke another argument in my blog or page I am okay with it. One peace and love at ya Mona Indi I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this response to you about your way of saying something isn't right I do believe I meant three strikes and your in out or your in. Sorry for the confusion, got back to work today and feel like I am still not strong enough to handle all the goings on yet. I got a fever going again, guess it is time for a visit to the old doctors again.
M

magics02

16 years ago

I dont sweat the small stuff

Or the big stuff for after all it is all small stuff right? You should know me by now, I dont play games either. The stars have been the topic of many here lately so I have to laugh I like what Barbs said about it, Maybe it is all in the star thing that gets people so upset and at least I see that happening, For example you give someone a one star and then tell them that their poem is crap it that not an abuse of a star? For real here and I have seen this in here before, it is a game for some I see. I never give anyone a star or even two. I think everyone deserves more then that. I also notice alot of repetitions of begging for stars too, I think that is childish also. I for one care more about a nomination than a star and even though I notice the five stars that I may get I notice there are no nominations, so what is the use of both is what I would like to know. I am starting to see why people dont use stars anymore because of all the controvery. It is like in grade school when you are good you get a smiley face. WHen your are bad you get a frown. ON the other hand when I know the reader is serious about giving stars and they award me 5 I know they meant to give it less they wouldn't. Someitmes I do not get any and I get a great comment so I don't focus soley on stars for feedback on my work. I do believe it is for content not controversy. Alot of this star stuff is mainly for acknowledgement to the author of the write if the reader indeeds feels it worthy of it, and that is fine too. Different strokes for different folks, that is why we are all different. I pick out typos not as a fault of anyones for that matter, but that is what I also do at my work for the past 25 years. I know people get upset over that and if so they have a right to tell me not to send them that part. As of late I get that impression anyhow. If I have misspelled anything I love for people to point this out since we are all in this workshop together. All I like to do is make the piece better for the writer not make fun of them. I have been asked from many people to proofread their letters, memos, poems, etc so I do that here just as I do on and off my job. I like to help if someone asks for it. I do not do it to make any fun at anyone that is for sure and you know that about me. Thanks for at least acknowledging my improvements as I noticed I have been thinking outside the box and trying to write the best of my present abilities. There is so much more to learn, a world of knowledge out there just got to make it happen. Thanks for your comments Love and Peace Mona xoxo xoxoxo
judyanne

judyanne

16 years ago

magic mona

your good heart shines through love judy xxx http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TwentyMyPrettyPonies.html
M

magics02

16 years ago

Hello Judyanne

How is my other Aussie friend doing? Thank you for the read and the comment I so appreciate it when I see your boy's pic on my page, Such a nice looking young man, my heart still bleeds for you honey and know that I can feel that ache across many miles. He looks just like you with those beautiful eyes. Was that your only child if I may ask? Love and Hugs Mona xoxoxo
judyanne

judyanne

16 years ago

thanks magics

no jeremy was my older, i have another boy, john, who lives in sydney (off to visit next month - holidays thank god) love to you judy xxx http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TwentyMyPrettyPonies.html
mand

mand

16 years ago

I love the last stanza. A

I love the last stanza. A rainbow of hope waiting to come out after the rain. Well done Mona. Love Mand xxxx
M

magics02

16 years ago

Thank you Mand

I wrote this in less then 10 minutes as I was in this frame of mind after reading someones story it made me think to lift one up the spirit that is and that is what I try to do in alot of my poetry. THank you and love right back at you Mand Mona xoxox
S

scribbler

16 years ago

if I could

Started reading and thought"AHA! she's going to try classic".oh well. thought deserved 5* for content and depth of feeling displayed.Someday I'll become familiar enough with free verse to comment on structure.Great write.......scribbler
M

magics02

16 years ago

Thank you Scribe

I dont know the different types, classic not classic LOL but I do know if people get it and can relate to it that means more to me then stars and lights for sure. I always appreciate an honest opinion of my writes as I write them from the heart and the mind as well. YOu are becoming very familiar with free verse and I believe you are doing the best you can and most of all your honest opinion means more to me than anything else right now. Love at ya my Scribe Keep up the good works Mona xox
S

Silent_Rain

16 years ago

Oh...

Ok, I think Imma cry... This is a wonderful poem!!!! Mona... your such a good friend!! ~Rain~
M

magics02

16 years ago

Thank you Rain

After I read your poem this is what inspired me to write this one, and yes of course I was thinking of you and many others as I wrote it Love Ya gal Mona
xena465

xena465

16 years ago

Superb Mona

I could feel your strong heart beating in this one for your dad. Love hurts, but you have to be strong. Xena
M

magics02

15 years 12 months ago

Thank you Xena

Hello gal and thank you first for your visit. Actually this wasn't written with Dad in mind but after I read it I guess it could be of him too as he is saddened with his health also. I wrote this for all who suffer, with broken hearts and sadness in their life. It is hard to see the forest for the trees sometimes gets in our way. Everyone experiences life differently and things.. From time and time again I know for I too, had many broken hearted feelings but know that only time will heal all wounds if only we let them go one by one. Hope you had a great day and will see you soon. Thanks again for the comment and always your visit. Love,Mona xoxoxo
xena465

xena465

15 years 12 months ago

It's nice to visit friends Mona

I knew you were worried about your dad so I thought I’d pay you a visit to say I hope he’s okay now. I’m glad that my visit helps you know that I think about everyone on Neo and that we all play an important part when it comes to supporting each other. Xena
Breakinglogic

Breakinglogic

15 years 12 months ago

Wonderful magic mum, How

Wonderful magic mum, How your writing has developed is amazing. I have another thought about this write I'd like to share, alas maybe tomorrow for today I dont feel like critiquing. Fantastic work, Peace and cheers, logic
ED

Eugene Docena

15 years 12 months ago

Magics02

This is very endearing. Quite lovely during the read. I liked the fact that you used more of an internal rhyme in the last stanza to give a sense of comfort, rather than the couplets you rhymed in the past stanzas as a means of certainty.
M

magics02

15 years 12 months ago

Thank you for your comments

I appreciate your take of this poem and you got it right all the way. Will be back to answer your other question. Your comments are appreciated Mona
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

15 years 12 months ago

Dear Mona

Your poem reached me. I have been sad all week. The rain we are getting doesn't help. What a sweetheart you are, to be thinking of the sad folk. Your poem is a ray of sunshine. Love, Cat
M

magics02

15 years 12 months ago

Thank you Golden

Been wondereing how you are feeling and I know the recoup time is long but listen to doc and get well soon. Sometimes we all go through sad periods in life and it is quite normal. It is when we open the shade and greet the sun again that makes us stronger as we go forward. A ray of sunshine is always a pleasant and beautiful gift that shines on all of us. Hope your doing better soon Love,Mona xoxoxo
Z

ziggy

15 years 12 months ago

hi

hi a nice read and sweet reasons behind writting it cheers good stuff always,,,,,,,,,,,, ziggy
M

magics02

15 years 12 months ago

Zigs

Zigs my friend how are you and thank you for stopping over for coffee..lol I always enjoy seeing you smile on my page, and when will we be seeing a new pic of you. Your pic always reminds me of a radio station person at the mike!! I appreciate you my friend from Ireland and always appreciate your warm comments, you can give me the cold ones too LOL I will still wuv ya honey!!! smile you just got a hug over the seas...water is calm Love and Peace Mona xoxoxo