Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

The Elements


In the shadows of the night,
colours merge in twilight.
The mist surrounds us,
night closes in.
Slumber overtakes,
so deep within.

Invading my solitude.
floating endlessly
on fluffy white clouds.
weightless - windless
nothing stirs.
Not even,
a breeze.

A vision of colour
lit by the sun.
Rainbow puddles,
shimmering shine.

Gently stirring with soft ease,
the first morning breeze.
The mist rises upwards,
to reveal what is below.
Mist lies motionless,
Awaiting the sun's glow.

Puddles like mirrors,
all in reverse.
Till darkness transforms,
when they disperse.

— Electric Blue, Dec 02, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: GBR

More from this author

Critiques

Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 6 months ago

The Elements

Debra I am totally consumed with the elements, that surround me. These living beings, in shapes and forms. I become a part of, In harmony am i.. The melody they sing, as if they are calling me, to come out and play. It is only me that can hear. Their soulful song. I am so lost within the melody, they sing. The outside world cannot enter in. So alone i walk and become one. Electricblue
Z

zarul

17 years 6 months ago

BEAUTIFUL PIECE

beautiful and vivid descriptions of nature. me too love the nature and all of the elements, with the soynd of the bird's chirping and water lapping. it is all mesmerizing, dont u thnk? BRAVO HUG ZARUL
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 6 months ago

The Elements

Zarul Thank you for your comments I love nature in all its elements. I hope you get to read some more of my peotry. I have view for some of yours hugs Electricblue
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 6 months ago

The Elements

zarul When I walk there. I am consumed within totally. By evey leaf, Every raindrop I am lifted on the cool breeze To travel windless weightless I can smell the rain Each leaf colours of life each an individual They are amazing they all tell a different story Raindrops fall on each leaf creating a melody They sing a soulful song.
W

W.C.Wampler

17 years 6 months ago

Element poem

E.B., I like the semi-rhyme pattern, the smooth flow, and imagery. The elements also inspire me. I do think you should review your last line. Is 'whey' an English word for 'when' ? wcw
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 6 months ago

The Elements

WC There are some poems that flow for me naturally in rhyme. I love being out in all elements. Last verse. "They sing a soulful song". Where did you get Whey from? Thank you for your comments Electricblue
W

W.C.Wampler

17 years 6 months ago

elements poem

E.B., What does the last line mean? wcw
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 6 months ago

The Elements

WC Thank you again for bringing this to my attention. My mind was racing and my hand not keeping up. I have put in another verse in Zarul reply. So I hope it has become clear. I do find some of my responses become more poems. Thank you again Electricblue
Race_9togo

Race_9togo

17 years 4 months ago

I like this one

The rhythm and imagery of this piece remind me of, of all things, walking my dog on a still and rainy summer morning, which I often do just as the sun rises. Don't know why it evokes this memory, but the feeling's really good. Thanks electric, another great write. Respectfully, Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race
yenti

yenti

17 years 4 months ago

Electric Blue

With your words and feelings throughout your writing, the name you use is beauty in its expression, colour, sound, looks, and vibration, electric blue is all these things, where it becomes a source of even thought its self. Hold these things to you and then share as you do with your writings, Yours Ian.T
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 4 months ago

Maggie,

I felt like running out and frolicking through the woods,(naked)to become one with all that surrounds me, but living in NYC I would have to drive for an hour to find woods. So I'll settle for a park bench and become one with the squirrels. (not naked) A really and absolute pleasure to read! Your imagery is so beautiful! I would love to live that way all the time. thanks, Eddie
themoonman

themoonman

17 years 4 months ago

Maggie...

don't know how I missed this one... love it it doesn't make me want to get naked though... loved Eddie's response too.. Richard
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 4 months ago

The Elements

Richard You do not know what you are missing. Up on my mountain. I get up, stand in my running stream of ice cold water. Get the bucket, fill it up and pour it over me. It is better than a shower. I just walk off into the woods and dry off. But skinny dipping is great too. You have not lived my friend. maggie