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WISH

Will my name still be remembered
When i am gone and covered with soil unnumbered
Will my tainted hands still be felt
For the bad mistakes I had left

Or will I just be forgotten
Like a container that's empty
Meaning nothing and useless to the people
As the passing away of a sickler feeble

Will my legacy be passed on
For the generation to come to carry on
To accomplish the mission I failed on.
And straighten the crooked path, for me to live on

Will my name still be remembered
For the good things I have done, that has outnumbered
The painful mistakes of mine people say
Or will I just be forgotten like a fish set to sail.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
How will people feel me, when am gone, will I be glad to attend my own funeral myself
Editing stage: 

Comments

by your title and it drew me in, that's what a title is designed to do.
Your language use is pretty good, although you forgot to use the [ I ] as in; "When I am gone.
Your rhythm is ok and the theme is one that most people ask themselves at one time or another.
It seems to be consistent all the way through and ends well.
1]. I don't think that you need the word [ unnumbered ] what is that supposed to mean?
2]. What is a stickler feeble?
3]. I think I would let go of the : " that has outnumbered.

All in all, a pretty fair poem, It just needs a little clean-up. ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you very much for the correction and reviewing, I promise to do better next time

author comment

your corrections here. Where you see the edit sign, click that and you will see the poem appear in the box below. Make your corrections there and then scroll down to the save and there you are! ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

...what on earth does " the passing away of a sickler feeble" mean?

And what is "a fish set to sail"? Last time I looked, fishes don't sail much.

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xxx
Edna
Poet(ess) to the Stars

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