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Why Smile

Imagine a world filled with frowning faces
with people seeing their lives as the worst

They are sad, angry, lost and alone,
their hopes reduced to the bones

Their hearts bound by misery and endless worries,
their minds sitting at the edge of a death wish.

Then comes a girl, greeting them with a smile
full of honesty, washing away the vile.

They will feel a new connection to life
because she makes them feel alive

And very soon everyone is smiling too
because her smile is as contagious as flu!

A smile adds colour to life like magic,
making people happy, feel fantastic!

Helps them to embrace positive energy
and kick out some of their negativity

See how a baby's smile lit a house with love
and the many beautiful moments it serves?

Now you know the why for it,
let's see you commit to it

Go on, smile!
It looks good on you!

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 


You should be ashamed of yourself.
A girl's smiles cures the world's ills?
You should be ashamed of yourself as a poet.

A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'

i didn't say it cures the world ill, i meant to say it gives strength for people to shoulder their trouble or forget them for a moment. i used the girl as a subject to appeal to the gentle side of human nature. even if i didn't deliver it the right way, aren't you supposed to guide me through instead of getting angry? not everyone is acknowledgeable as you and we all see things in a different perspective point of view and all of us have our own opinions on certain things. if you read the piece through, the girl is not the only subject i used. there's also the baby.again i'm appealing to the gentle side of humanity. if you don't agree, fine. share with me your opinions, not your anger, 'cos i'm here to learn. i say it once, i say it again, I AM HERE TO LEARN!!!! if you cannot accept that, then at least be respectful enough not to comment. remember, you're supposed to comment on the poem, not to implicate the poet.. I'm not the one who set this rule. this is a place to learn, not to disrespect others. if i can respect you enough as a learnt poet, why can't you respect me enough to be understanding to a novice? did any of the words in my poems aimed to hurt anyone? i can tell you right now.NO!! So please, don't make me lose my respects to you, Sir!

from one human to another

author comment

Yes, I used my anger to to abuse you, instead of supporting you in you gentleness. I am am a major critic on Neopoet but I am not always right, and this time I wasn't. Sorry. I will re-read the poem and try again,ok?

A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'

i grew up a child of the times....vietnam breathing down our
necks....the bible the dire grim happy place..
the fairytales full of semi dead young beautys
and savagery that seemed correct..
why shoot the wolf...

then hollywood and indie film
began to move between the stern and
the laughter...the shadows of light
the shadows of dark flickering
like a cinema

i remember happy face buttons
and peace chicken posters day glo
peace buttons
in a social fabric battle torn and full
of holes of the ideals of youth
alive and dead
arriving as fast as those shipped
away for the year tour

and i remember the smiles
unhinging that pin
the wavelength like a soft
sweet hand coming down
on the hammer
slipping back the tension
on the spring
the finger drawing all
that fear
and hate

the smile like sunshine
the last moment of
wished for hope
the kiss to awaken
the sleeping

round the world
its universal
and can change
make days

a great poem
and succint
in our time of nee

thank you

and I thank you for the visit and for the gift of words


author comment

this poem is dedicated to jasmine........................................ but i felt the touching presence of your imagery and the connection to your theme but using a woman as imagery always provokes very shallow kaleidoscope , the imagery of the baby would have given you more pacific modulus

I'll do what I can to improve on my style but I'm telling you,Emeka, it'll take time 'cos I'm not good with imagery in the first place.I just want to challenge myself a bit here...Thanks for your comment and for your visit. Much appreciated.


author comment

I see that you said that you were not good at imagery, it may be that you are not using your seeing facilities.
Your eyes are connected to a system in your brain that has infinity if you open the door.
At the moment you are looking in two dimensions, now use your third and fourth dimensions, learn how to pass that surface you see and peel back the layers of any item you see, look at the inside of a flower then feel the power in there as with a seed buried deep underground.
Now feel that energy that makes a seed send a shoot to the surface, and so on it goes this is the third dimension.
Now the hard part the fourth dimension,
Close your eyes and wait until there is a light spot in the dark, now follow that light spot, it will probably be a blueish colour, it will take you to any place you wish to go and see, you are now using your mind to go out and touch the universe, NOW write about what your mind sees,
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

its putting them into words is where I am facing the problem. I'll try one about the Cyberworld, you tell me how I do. been itching to write about it for awhile...


author comment
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