Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
The Wending Day
The fish we caught
The vegetables we bought
Tasted of fire
A hundred mile
And a thousand year journey
Back to the woods
Where man is subject
To nature
Not the other way around
We need these reminders
Now and again
That not all roads
Are paved
By human advancement
And endeavor
Not all time
Is punched by man’s
Belligerent clock
But sometimes the best
Memories
Are so close to primordial
The smell of a rolling smoke
Started from
A spark on a rock
The scent of an ancient forest
A dependent moss
Fresh as rain and wind
The sounds of bright-hearted birds
And the crucial position
Of the sun
In the sky
Throughout the wending day
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Other recent work
Active Workshops & Contests
Contest
Workshop
- Splash Pool: How to use imagery in poetry..
- Wading Pool: Neopoet How To Video Resources
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 2
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 1
- Plunge Pool: Stream Workshop
Comments
Eumolpus
Mon, 2019-04-08 01:13
Good descriptions and
I like the poem and the message and the narrative to get to the finale.
Te word wending is the most important word in the poem. In the title and last line, and a word I had to look up ; "To proceed on or along; go: wend one's way home." I could not find wending, using to wend as a adjective, and the word's intent or meaning is still lost to me. It does sound good, but it should mean something, but i can't make the connections...
Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings
Eumolpus
Mon, 2019-04-08 01:13
Good descriptions and
I like the poem and the message and the narrative to get to the finale.
Te word wending is the most important word in the poem. In the title and last line, and a word I had to look up ; "To proceed on or along; go: wend one's way home." I could not find wending, using to wend as a adjective, and the word's intent or meaning is still lost to me. It does sound good, but it should mean something, but i can't make the connections...
Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings
gregwa8
Mon, 2019-04-08 01:32
I didn’t realize it wasn’t an
I didn’t realize it wasn’t an adjective. I’m getting my poetic license on here, I guess. It’s not too far of a leap. It’s like the way run can be used as an adjective, as running river,etc. Wending here would mean slowly or naturally progressing. To counter the way we use time to become busy or regimented. Thanks for the close reading.
author comment