an excellent terza rima ... and perfect iambic pentameter too :)

i especially love the concept of
'I dreamt of children who shall never cry
but joy their youth and land upon the moon
with laughs to moisture air that once was dry'

but - lol - you know me by now :)
i think the second lines needs work
my suggestion
'their joyful youth to land upon the moon'

i love the text of this write
- those shadows ... so well described by saying what is lost rather than actually dwell the write about them

love judy
xxx

I don't have to tell you how good this is, so all I can say is well done.

Alid

You are missing your four line envoy. Go back to the beginning of the thread for directions. Two of the lines rhyme with parts of the last stanza and two rhyme with themselves.

The envoy is that section of the poem where it is brought together. Generalizing (if that's a word) all of what you said.
Remember the rule: Tell them what you are going to say, say it and then tell them what you said.
The third part of that business is the "envoy", meaning "last words".

"when shadows blew away the dreams of which were mine"
oh Palestine..Oh Isrieal
Love your poems....
our sheltered driven underground
social shit for my city
is not the heated shot for shot
life of others

thats day too day

we have ours
tainted when it rains

twas U whom guided me
on certian advise
and Im glad

Rula the wise!!

if U make it too eighteen your beating odds
if you make it to thirty another round
on the roulette wheel
and forty.....well...ur an old hand!!!!!!!!!

me...I was snake eyes
I would have been a runner
im certian

the snipers looking
sad but true

awesome poem!
though...even though
its so very true
and very very
sad Rula!

:(

.

Its beautiful rula