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A STUDY IN PINK SECTION 21

What a night! Riding off with Urilla's body
Beneath a blood drenched sky!
The demon was upon us or so they thought
Imaginations really played their part!

They never knew it was me, too busy worrying about my sexuality.
Back home, I was James Alastair, beloved detective and friend
When the bodies showed up, the Headless Horseman was born
Investigating my own crime scenes.
I was the one, feared almost as much as the Ripper himself.

Met Arnold down near the river bed, blade and bucket in his hand.
Time for another rousing game of "off with her head!"
The perfect little trophy, propped up on a stick,
To join the others forever, my perfect little clique!

Such a shame good old Arnold was ready to crack
Really broke my heart to snap his neck.
Took his place with all the rest, .
Lined up in the cellar, where no one would suspect!

Standing up at attention, the heads await my instruction!
Lips stitched tight, so they won't make a sound!
Oh Guy, it was a shame but you were digging too deep!
Eyes pinned open with needles so they have to look into my desires!

Alabaster, you perverted bastard with your sexual fantasies
Maybe in another life, had I really been a woman
Urilla, my beauty, you now join the group
I couldn't have you in life, but I will forever in death

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
My edited and re-edited section, this is a little longer than what the criteria calls for but per Wesley, this is ok. It was necessary to start to wrap this up and get the details out there.
Editing stage: 

Comments

Well written and leaves an opening for the next ones to write.
There are words forming for my third write, yet I cannot read them until they draw near, we now have to find that wife of Mackwill's he is far to smug, and hasn't yet felt the temper of Creel.
Loved your write and it was well crafted, Yours Ian x

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thank you for the read. I figured this would open the door to a climax and the end...find the head..the head is the key. ..will put an end to the mystery...

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

That you have mentioned that there maybe a head in the river, that makes three, now we have to join all these together, There are two heads in the grounds of the old Tyburn prison, now I have to sort that out and have them found, then we will have a big reunion of heads and bodies.
Hope I can escape from here without being killed LOL.
Take care out there Mog is on the loose,
Yours J Creel

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Good luck finding the heads. It seems I am not writing this the way it should so I am going to let the rest finish this up.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

Good write Carrie. now all these dead bodies with no head frifzroy, mackwell, Anabel,
Now who's left? Guy, Urilla, creel, Arnold who, I've forgotten,

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Is dead...Anabel killed him. So we have mackwill, urilla, arnold, creel, maybe mackwill wife....time to find the head

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I may have it confused somewhat I thought maxwell dead too

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

and seemingly Mog, you need to reflect that in your section. If you need extra room feel free to add lines.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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Carrie and Rula got me confused. I'll have to wait till they are in the granite of the main thread before I can get it straight. Then it's alid. Once he write his based on Carrie and Rula then I got a great ending it will wow you. Already started but revising on demand.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

MACKWELL DEAD? Can somebody tell me when or which section? Couldn't find it. I was thinking of following up with him...

Alid

I must read two or more times to get it straight. Wes might you there's. He helped me.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

To be clear...Anabel is alive and road off w urilla to chop off her head???

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I got that. My story is amazing just waiting on rula and alid now

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Rula's section and it had Anabel as still alive, I see now it is totally different again after I posted my edits. I wrote this as Anabel being the killer since that is how Rula left things the last time I saw it. I fear I am going to be asked to rewrite this again and I really don't want to because I like it. I am getting frustrated.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I don't see why you are confused or frustrated. Annable is alive and she is the killer of Urilla the detective.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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So I read it right? What is in the stream is different, maybe I read something wrong??? I see the correction you made in the comments but what is in the stream is different so that is where my confusion is. Okay. I am glad I am not losing my mind and I did it right

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I like how this came out, even if it is a tad bit longer. I think it puts you in the mind of the killer. Would like everyone to try to feel the emotion of this depraved individual. This is written with a sense of euphoria, over zellous excitement at his killing so many and being able to take a prize with him to continuously relive the acts. :)

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

Everyone pick up a wrench and throw it. Carrie threw hers and look at the mess she made.
I love it.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

I hoped my part will do her justice.

Alid

Thank you. No one does a depraved mind like I do, other than Gee, can't wait to see what you all contribute from this point on.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment
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