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In the spirit of autumn (September Contest)

The street ahead
A kaleidoscope of colors
Beautiful no doubt

Chill air seeped into his bones
Hands nearly frail
coming up to inhale once more

Then came epiphany
It was time for change
He let his ego shed like leaves in autumn

There is nothing like home
And home he returned to.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
We don't have autumn in Nigeria, so it took awhile to write this
Editing stage: 
Contest: 

Comments

post it as contest
must do
its fun

this must have been miss-posted and was supposed to be in the contest. Please do, as Lovedly asks and post it in the contest. I can appreciate the work and thought that went into this, as you have never seen a real Autumn. I wonder where your thoughts were going in the second stanza? What is the significance of the line: Coming up to inhale once more? And the word you are looking for is [seeped] not sipped. Work it over a little bit and post in the contest. You never know...
~ Geezer.
.

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author comment

participation is a must
we all run marathons
only one wins

I see you hit the contest tab when you posted this. I'd appreciate it if you'd also put (september contest) next to title so folks can easily see it Is a contest poem. And I can't imagine what it must be like to not have an autumn.......stan

Done that... Thanks

author comment

participation

In all my life I have never won
yet still play on
outstanding in all games
as a lines man!

Wonderful poem I see nothing I'd change good luck in the comp

Sincerely J :)

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Thank you very much

author comment

congrats man
now u have a long way to go

I'm really grateful

author comment

but the best must win
u did
my congrats still

I can't thank you enough..thanks

author comment
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