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Solo

A gorgeous silence
fell on your departure,
air that once shimmered
ire and malice,
is now clear and free
and fit to be breathed, in

days were lost,
the minutes crept
into numb hours,
feet turned circles
into squares
dumb of what to do
where to go

the mind flooded
with vast arrays
of pictured thoughts,
emotions scream
to boil, then nothing,
blank screens
all the way round

anchoring self
onto a listing lull
instilled the sublime,
falling for the silence
and drifting into the
grace of peace

I find myself
beautifully solo

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

good story of the space left by someone leaving, it also gives you time to think of all the lovely things you can fill those spces with, Take care and know that the tap of a key and we will be there, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I'm sure you understand where all this comes from, some of its autobiographical some maybe small prophecies... I know your but a key stroke away that always gives me comfort thank you my friend

Thanks for the read I appreciate it

Much love always JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

What can I say? I will just say that

Between
A gorgeous silence
and
grace of peace
is that catharsis
leading you into
a beautiful solitude

words have emoted pretty well

much love and hugz...

raj (sublime_ocean)

I glad you liked it

Love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

has a totally different meaning
for many

your solo
soliloquy
is wonderful

loved

Very happy you enjoyed it

Love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

This well conveys your emotions without being mauldin. A few ideas for you to sit around and think about as heat of day forces sweat to drip off your nose(poetic prose? LOL):
Feet followed circles
within squares
3rd stanza , l-5 I'd have isolated "nothing" either by putting ellipses in front of it or by putting it in its own line
The first stanza was as good a set up for the rest of the poem as I've seen in a while...........stan

That's an awesome idea for "nothing" I will include it in my edit, I will give your both suggestion some thought though in leaning with turned but I may change my mind, I'll be doing a fait few edits in the next couple of days this will be one of them...

Very glad you enjoyed the first stanza

Love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

she takes my breathe away
My lady, what can I say?
When you spin this beauty
I felt it lit with honesty
I am mesmerized
as my soul take flight,
celebrating an angel's art
coming straight from the heart

Alid
Do you know how many times I say to myself "I want to be like her."? See your works which I have commented and multiply it by a hundred...

That's a beautiful compliment, I am nothing special, I write my little scribbles and hope that people find something to enjoy or connect with, that's the most that any of us can ask for, I can share here and say what I want without fear, opening up a part of me that's closed off to the rest of the world, and a lot of what I write is truth or part truth, I find the best poetry is the real stuff

thanks for your lovely lovely compliment it really made my night I have been unwell and that just made me smile

big big hugs of love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

I think it depends on one's perspective point of view. you may think you are nothing special but i've been told that everyone is unique in their own way. My dear, what you call scribbles , others may call art. i say what i mean, I'm always eager to read your works. they are precious to me, both as a source of inspiration and good examples of great poetry. I agree the best poetry is the real stuff.

I hope that you are feeling better when you are reading this. its good to know that i've made you smile. like Ian have said. you know that at the tap of a key and we will be there,

let me be the candlelight
in your darkest night
to accompany you
until the day returns

sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite
rest well, my friend..goodnight

Alid

It makes me very happy that you enjoy my poetry, we all want to be read but at the end of the day its a bonus, I get such a thrill from writing I always feel a kind of rush when I am writing, Sometimes you write a poem that you instinctively know is good, that makes all the work worthwhile :)

I don't know that my poetry is great but I appreciate the thought, I will be writing till I die its in my blood and I cant get away from it

Your little verse reminds me of a line in lord of the rings

"let this be a light for you in the dark when all others go out"

lovely

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

that's like my fav fantasy-based story of all time! i do share your passion for writing, jayne. some of the songs and movies i enjoy makes me want to write a poem about their theme. sadly though , the attempt is not as successful as i wanted it to be. some even turns out crappy while others just didn't get written 'cos i got stuck again. Take for example the song "diamond" from Rihanna. i got this story in my head about a girl who just realize her best friend is actually in love with her and she has decided to accept him. but I just couldn't find the right words,:o(

Alid

I also have a passion for the Tolkien stories, I don't know if you know but he was also a poet you should have a look sometime :)

Hmmm I don't know if I should give this advice I might get crucified but its hard to write poetry about something you haven't experienced it takes someone with great talent or someone with many years of experience to pull it off. I know what your doing, I have done it myself, BUT if the theme really appeals to you put yourself in the picture become part of the poem and bring that with you to the page, try and imagine the emotions the person is going through you can imagine the scene that's easy well for me it is and experience it as best you can without actually living it. Read stories about it there is always a million stories on the one subject submerse yourself in the topic until it becomes a part of you

I have found for me the best stuff comes from the real stuff there is always truth or partial truth in my poems, that you can count on

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

and fit to be breathed, in (please fix the comma).

Another good piece.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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Not much about 3 hours a night... will fix the comma didn't notice it thanks for the heads up

glad you enjoyed it

Love Jayne x

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment
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