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Shower

I am now lying on the incline of a levee,
and look up in wonderment at the full sky
which seems much larger, more imposing,
as its third dimension pulls me deeper in.

I am far away from the modern city sky
the constant blinding by light pollution,
away from the high buildings that block
and slice the sky in many assorted angles.

Here, the sound of the mighty Mississippi
drifts on the stilled and syrupy night air,
and the fireflies, quite beautiful at dusk,
are no longer bright masters of the night.

All the stars above are so very numerous
they seem reluctant to allow dark spaces
in between; only the milky way succeeds
to splash its full will against the night sky.

...then suddenly, a fantastic show begins;
across the sky a flash traces a curvature
and before it is fully gone another begins,
that soon I am turning my head all around.

Childlike, with eyes that know immanence,
(before learning words to represent fact)
the electricity of innocence, and of wonder,
takes hold of me, inhibitions have flown.

Such joy, joy, O the wonder of the heavens
as falling stars criss cross, and flash across
this bowl-like sky, that fills to the horizon
to rim-light benediction on a waiting earth.

Now my childlike heart will not be restrained
as she leaps up to touch, be one with mystery;
a pulse racing through her that denies all words
which would call this wonder a shower of dust.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Editing stage: 

Comments

fantasy nicely captured in words with childlike innocence creating a rustic landscape in contrast to the urban thereby making the unseen beauty of nature seen...

raj (sublime_ocean)

I especially love the alacrity of the thoughts in this piece and the coda reads just beautiful.

PS. I see this is not actively edited but I just like to ask if L1 in S8 should be "childlike heart"?
Also I thought the "such joy, joy,O .... is just a tautology (imo)

An enjoyable read indeed with many favorite lines.
Thanks for sharing.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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Hello dear Rula
you sent me to the dictionary with coda. Thank you

Yes it should be childlike. I have changed it.

tautology, needless repetition of an idea, (why you keep sending me to the dictionary)

I do not think in this case it's needless repetition.

These lines prepares it. electricity of innocents and inhibitions flown. Now nothing to stop the emotional outburst.
"the electricity of innocence, and of wonder,
takes hold of me, inhibitions have flown."

And now comes the outburst.
"Such joy, joy, O the wonder of the heavens"

I was trying to show a heart overcome by wonder.

T

The most powerful reaction
of mind on mind
is transference of sight

author comment

Thanks so much for the clarification.
Sorry for sending twice to the dictionary. should I consider this a praise ? :)

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

Thanks so much for the clarification.
Sorry for sending you twice to the dictionary. should I consider this a praise ? :)

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

though, as you say in the poem, this wonderful scene "denies all words," you do a great job with words to capture its sublimity, its innocent wonder. thank you.
greg

thanks for your thoughts on this poem
greg

T

The most powerful reaction
of mind on mind
is transference of sight

author comment

thanks raj
I am happy you felt the childlike innocents embedded in the poem.

T

The most powerful reaction
of mind on mind
is transference of sight

author comment
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