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Second title less poem (title shop)

i am not a painter, I am a poet.
Why? I think I would rather be
painter, but I am not. Well,

For instance, Mike Goldberg
is starting painting, I drop in.
"sit down and have a drink."he
says. I drink, we drink.I look
up. "You have sardines in it."
"yes, it needed something there."
"Oh." I go and the days go by
and I drop in again. The painting
is going on, and I go, and the days
go by. I drop in.Where's 'Sardines?"

All that's left is just
letters. "It was too much."Mike says.

But me? One day I am thinking of
a color: orange.I write a line
about orange.Pretty soon it is a
whole page of words, not lines.
Then another page. There should be
so much more, not of orange, of
words, of how terrible orange is
and life. Days go by.It is even in
prose. I am a real poet. My poem
is finished an I haven't mentioned
orange yet. It's twelve poems, I call
it ORANGES. And one day in a gallery
I see Mike's painting, called Sardines.

By Frank O'Hara

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
OK. This time I will post my suggested title Last instead of first so get to scratching your heads lol
Editing stage: 
Workshop: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

The smell of orange paint

Is my title...

Orange is the main character and there are sardines, that have that strong smell. paint well he probably wants to express himself more with paint.

That's the most interesting poem, I really love it.

Thank you...Teddy

It's not so much what it says as what it infers . "smell of orange paint" that's also interesting

author comment

I like the title; "The Orange Sardines". Thinking of sardines and how they disappeared, I was struck by the way your poem was about oranges, but they never appeared until you were finished and used them for the title. The sardines were prominent until the painting was finished and then they disappeared. The two thoughts combined to make "Orange Sardines"! ~ Geez.
.

Come to chat every Thursday - 3:30 to 4:30 pm. EST.
With: c Lynn Brooks and Geezer

Not too sure I'd like orange sardines.,,,,,,,,,,.........

author comment

Take it seriously Stan
lol

Thank you...Teddy

They might be alright along side green eggs and ham.................

author comment

"Sardines In The Galary"
Just trying to add some fun to the whole thing.I wanted to give the reader some food for thought and some fun too.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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Hopefully somebody took the sardines out of the gallery before they turned bad lol

author comment

Firstly, and lastly, A wonderful, wonderful poem!

"Sardinian skies"

Obi.

That is good twist.

author comment

what a wonderful title, Sardinian skies

it actually made me think of why he painted the sardines in the first place, because he had the space!

Thank you...Teddy

I would call it: The Process. Both forms of art started in one place, and evolved into something else.
Thanks!
L

It Does have a lot to do about process

author comment

would be my choice.

'About Orange'
by Frank O'hara

.......................................
Critique is a compliment
Kind regards, Alan
.......................................

for a complex poem

author comment

another beautiful title because it makes you think of all the things orange represents

a positive title much like the colour, i like it very much sir, orange represents happiness and successs also enthusiasm.

Thank you...Teddy

Time, Sardines and Oranges. I'll give ya'll the poet's title this evening in case somebody else want to weigh in

author comment

Title------------orange represents success----------- after all he got his painting into the gallery and the poet also got some poetry

probably i am over thinking but i absolutely love this poem, good choice!

Thank you...Teddy

oranges and lemons

lemons are as famous as sardines in sardinia, and they use them to cover the smell

i will for sure to go away now, stan your workshop has been so wonderful.

Thank you...Teddy

can we all hear the real title of this wonderful, wonderful poem please?

Thank you...Teddy

"WHY I AM NOT A PAINTER"

author comment

Fabulous, he used his first lines and I didn't see it!

Thank you...Teddy

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