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Pray Tell Parishioner

Submitted by brittle light on Sat, 2012-07-14 22:45

1- wanna know sumpin'

2-what's that

1-I don't know nothin'

2-sayin' you don't know nothin'
is kinda knowin' sumpin' ain't it

1- guess so, but the point is,
are you sure we ain't just been guessin' at stuff all this time
'cause I been told guessin' ain't quite the same as knowin'

2- pray tell, what are you sayin'

1- I ain't sure certain 'bout nothin' no more

2- well... I won't tell nobody if you don't

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
I don't know if this is poetry or not, and the format is a little clumsy anyway. Got any suggestions (other than deleting it)?
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Tam the Chanter

Tue, 2012-07-17 06:22

Tam the Chanter's picture

I started life knowin' nothin' - I guess I remember most of it

I started life ownin' nothin' - I've still got most of it left.

I'm holding my own ! Damn ! I'm good!

Regards

Ian

TIME FLIES LIKE AN ARROW, BUT FRUIT FLIES LIKE A BANANA

brittle light

Thu, 2012-07-19 06:21

brittle light's picture

nice little piece in your comment
you should post it, meaning I would, if it were mine. It's very good!

thanks for stopping by
I appreciate it a lot

Al

author comment

Kailashana2

Tue, 2012-07-17 07:17

Just quotes would suffice, the title explains all. Though I like this one and a two format too, unique in its own way.

"wanna know sumpin'"

"what's that?"

"I don't know nothin'"

~A

brittle light

Thu, 2012-07-19 06:15

brittle light's picture

things seem a little different around here, don't they?
c'est la vie, though I do miss the days before the great crash.
That kind of freshness never gets old. Staleness is a bummer, but I hope not fatal for the site, or to cause some of my favorite individuals to emmigrate.

thanks for your suggestions about this piece

regards,

Al

author comment

Ian.T

Thu, 2012-07-19 13:54

Ian.T's picture
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I like this as it is so full of double negatives that it becomes a play on words from two, who don't know nothin, so they must know sumpin, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

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