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Painted Green Pastures

The street light strayed into the room
piercing like cat eyes
stalking the night
patiently waiting for the field mouse
to let its guard down.

Only the shadows move
as the heart races,
pumping a raging chemical river
flooding through the valley
of your memories -
you'll never think that way again

In the morning,
a pair of slippers is slid on your feet

(shoe laces are not allowed in here)

then they walk you to a chair
to teach you how to sit again

In your lap
they place a box
little holes punched
in the sides and on the top
so the field mouse
can breathe

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

sorry. It's evocative and haunting, I kept thinking of the gas chamber.
It reads well,
if you want to hear ny reading of it, click the link.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1rnA5IXkhFP

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Your voice is amazing when it comes to listening to poetry. Even makes my shit sound kind of good.

Thanks for recording it. I am going to make some edits to see if I can properly add some pauses/changes in tone that did not come through. Perhaps you would be kind enough to record again after that.

As for understanding it, I have been reading a lot of Anne Sexton lately. Specifically her poems with regards to stays in mental institutions. this is my remedial attempt at responding to her

Scott

author comment

yes, I would be happy to.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

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