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One Person's Wild is Another Person's Tame

If only my life
had a weather vane

Growth a clear E
& W
N & S

When I feel like I’m going forward
Someone tells me
I’m falling behind

When I feel like I’ve graduated
I find I have to cover
The very same ground

Like light refracted through water
The "truth"
Juts at a strange angle
Out of reach

Like wild horses
I wonder if it is better
More beautiful and right
Never to tame them at all

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 


"Like Wild horses" I love the concept of horses very nicely done
. This written piece is adorable your words captured my imaginative thought process
out of everything that you have written thus far this is the truest and the best
I'm eager to read more of your works its very heart warming to the soul

Mario Vitale

Like so many of your works, you have a great knack to hit on a metaphor, an idea, which is unique and opens a universe of possibilities.
In this one, my own take, is to follow it up. Refer back to the weather vane - how it could points, change with the wind, lead you in different directions. IF your life had a weather vane, you could do this or that, you could be this type of person or that...or you could rail against the prevailing wind...

The last stanza is great, but I don't catch the connection. I'm still caught up in the idea of the weather vane, a great into.
As usual, my take.


I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

thanks Eumolpus for noticing and encouraging the use of metaphor in my poetry. I think, like you're pointing out in your comments here, sometimes my poetry can jump around a lot, with different seemingly unconnected metaphors. as I work to find my own voice, I take note, that a single metaphor can go a long way, too. trying to keep at writing regularly so I can continue to work out the kinks. :)

author comment

This poem seems important to me at this juncture because it addresses self worth and standing as a poet, or as a person It is self reflective without a clear path to an acceptable identity
The complex management of ones ambiguity
It addresses pride, inner directedness and oppositional forces
What am I
Why am I favored or why do I fall from favor?

I wont comment on this as a poem in terms poetry
I'm simply not up to it at the moment because I'm feeling all the above like a wounded bull in a china shop

thanks Zebra for stopping in. I guess conflict is like the wind that gets us where we're going. can't imagine a day without it. though, like the poem tries to get at, I don't have to adopt everyone's sense of success as my own.

author comment

well said

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