Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

My Sister | I’m Gonna Miss You My Sister

I remember when you were one
and I was two
You would fall in the ditch at noon
and ladies of the barn would yell
the baby fell
she’s in the ditch again.

We worked the farms together
Picked cotton as babies,
Sucked and topped tobacco,
We picked okras, beans
cucumbers, sweet potatoes

We strung up tobacco at the barn
took it off the stick in the pack house
better than the adults
Me and you nobody else.

I’m gonna miss you my sister
Like I missed you the day
mama took you on her back
and left me behind with grandma
How I felt then is how I feel now
I’m gonna miss you my sister
You leaving me alone on my own.

Mama followed you in life
Now you following her in death
I’m gonna miss you my sister
Here alone on my own.

You followed me in life
Through the thick and the thin
Now you leaving into the goodnight
I’m gonna miss you my sister

Fourteen months apart on the seventeenth
You followEd me here
Now you leaving me alone on my own
I’m gonna miss you my sister.

Your dreams never manifested
Nursing, opening up your adult daycare
ideas stolen,
You got married,
bought first home,
Lost babies,
Your dreams dismiss.

Together we walked this journey
You followed me here
Mama follow you in life
Then mama passed on but never gone
You following her now into the goodnight.

Like the day mama left me
riding you on her back
Into the woodsy night.

This time you won’t return
leaving me here alone on my own
I’m gonna miss you my sister
Here alone on my own
you passing on into the goodnight
to be with mama where daddy already was
where both has passed on but never gone
I’m gonna miss you my sister here alone
All alone on my own.

Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Is this the story of you and your sister? I think you will never get over the loss, but you will deal with it on the same level that you have before. Being alone is some of the worst pain, but you will always have a family here. I am not about to critique this now, I will give it time to settle. ~ Geez.
.

Our Chatroom is open 24/7 Feel free to use it for
keeping in touch We have poets around the world and it is fun
to have real-time conversations with those that are up
all night or on the other side of the world.
.

I really appreciate you stopping by. There’s 8 of us but I’m closest to her. The others I can’t never could get close together

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

Hello darling, i feel your pain and the pain of our geezer so i have taken some time to show you a little edit, i have changed just two words and used numbers written in letters, i think it always looks better, i think your language is very well spoken i can truly hear your voice in this, and like Geezer has very kindly pointed out, that you are not alone.

I remember when you were one
and I was two
You would fall in the ditch at noon
and ladies of the barn would yell
the baby fell, she’s in the ditch again.

We worked the farms together
Picked cotton as babies,
Sucked and topped tobacco,
We picked okras, beans
cucumbers, sweet potatoes

We strung up tobacco at the barn
took it off the stick in the pack house
better than the adults
Me and you nobody else.

I’m gonna miss you my sister,
Like I missed you the day
mama took you on her back,
and left me behind with grandma
How I felt then is how I feel now
I’m gonna miss you my sister

You leaving me alone on my own.
Mama followed you in life
Now you following her in death
I’m gonna miss you my sister
Here alone on my own.

You followed me in life
Through the thick and thin
Now you leaving into the goodnight
I’m gonna miss you my sister

fourteen months apart on the seventeenth
You followed me here,
Now you leaving me alone, on my own
I’m gonna miss you my sister.

Your dreams never manifested
Nursing, opening up your adult daycare, ideas stolen,
You got married, bought first home,
Lost babies, your dreams gone.

Together we walked this journey
You followed me here
Mama follow you in life
Then mama passed on but never gone
You following her now into the goodnight.

Like the day mama left me
riding you on her back
Into the woodsy night.
This time you won’t return,
leaving me here alone on my own
I’m gonna miss you my sister

Here alone on my own
you passing on into the goodnight
to be with mama where daddy already was
where both have passed on but never gone,

I’m gonna miss you my sister here alone
All alone on my own.

Thank you...Teddy

The suggestions are awesome. You didn’t changed a thing. You made it look better.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

in a modern
multi genetic coded known society
rely on none

the others could be worse
seen you since ages
poetess
this is my frank verse

Glad you see again. I know we all are different and absolutely rely on none. Don’t even connect with the other 6 sibling like I do with her. As she lay the hospital on life support she don’t want I’m not speaking to them at this point. All six on my nerve including the hubby

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

Glad to see you again. I know and we all are different and I absolutely rely on none. Don’t even connect with the other 6 sibling. I only connected with her. As she lay the hospital on life support she don’t want I’m not speaking to them at this point. All six on my nerve including the hubby

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

A lovely write, I have now lost three Brothers and three Sisters, here at home we have a memory tree, each has a heart there with a short verse..
We were 10 now two, we were a very close knit family, I miss each of them, so I understand the deeper feelings you hold..
Take care of you, as you are loved by those that have journeyed on, and those that you hold here,
Yours as always Ian xx

Words can build a nation

I am were 1/13
all gone only one now in Hospy
oft and on
will beat me in this life's session

I knew each one
Lots of laughter and football fun
now none
alone am
bro Ian

(((Hugs))) glad you stop by for a read.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

Sorry to hear if your losses. She the first of 8 to be here. Glad you stop by for a read

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.