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Mewling (after Robert Frost's "Mowing")

If Robert Frost were writing today
When lawn mowers scream and sputter
Catch a snake or mouse unmercifully
In their alternating blades (and blood!)
When cars and planes pollute the world
With their fumes and noise and such
So that no wilderness remains completely wild
When diesel tractors not hearty horses
Do most of the work and pesticides are sprayed
On the grass and the flowers and the fruit
He would not be talking about labor and hay
The way he does, as a gold more noble than elven coins
He would be listening to death metal
Instead of Alexander's Ragtime Band
And reading Camus or Norman Mailer
Writing about the corruption of pristine lands
Wars started by U.S. governments in the Middle East
Smelly gasoline in a push or riding mower.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 


thanks markL. i thought of the meter, too, since the original poem, "mowing," has such a strict meter. i thought of making a complex rhyme scheme, like his poem, too. not something i'm gonna tackle right now. but something i hope i will come back to, in a while.

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be happy you don't have to collect
horsey dungey
left by his horse
along forests
Roads yet to be taken

It seems you and I loved Frost
so read my NOBEL one
ere it does ON NEO

hi lovedly. i read it the other day. enjoyed it. another poet on here wrote a modern rendition of Frost's "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening." It's coming up all Frost! Lol.

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else let em



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I think he'd likely still be writing about the little details which make life beautiful. Remember there was ugliness even back in his time and he even mentioned some of it ( such as cutting forests and stringing power lines) but he usually incorporated these things within a poem which overall was filled with beauty.
Now on to the poem itself. In my opinion this would read a lot better if broken into stanzas which would also reflect back on the classic forms Frost usually used thus reinforcing the idea that he might have written it. I'm kinda lost about the title "Mewling". Doesn't seem to fit for some reason. But overall I liked the poem and the way it got me to thinking (thanks for resultant headache lol).....stan

Thanks Stan. Definitely agree, Frost would have handled modern topics with a lot more grace, wisdom, and beauty. The benchmarks of his poetry. This is sort of a tongue in cheek poem. Kind of a sarcastic twist on such a beautiful sentiment (the whispering of the scythe) in his original poem. That's why I chose to call it, "Mewling." Mewling could be like complaining about something, which is something that Robert Frost definitely didn't do. Nor would he probably listen to death metal. Lol. But the world certainly has changed, and become much less pastoral, idyllic then it was, I think. Which is what his poem "Mowing" was about. I think you are so right about Frost. And I'm glad my poem made you think (though I'm sorry about the headache. lol.)

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Reading the thought embedded in your poem makes me pen better than sword..if so why have wars eclipsed the pens over eras... having said that...poets may not be as prophets should continue to influence minds..

raj (sublime_ocean)

definitely true, raj. though we both probably agree, the world, ourselves included, has benefited SO MUCH from the pen. life is a battle, and art, i think, is one of the best battle grounds. often fighting war itself. thanks for the read and comments!

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you use my pen
use my minds ink
on the canvas blank just throw it
and with the pen like brush
you may have
draw the strokes you wish
across the canvas
when ink has yet to dry
then Frost will come by
to say
three friends
I have
raji- gregy and lovedly
stand by

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