Welcome to Neopoet!
I like the title of your poem,
I like the rhythm and cadence, although there are some places where it fails badly,
such as line 2 of verse 2, and line 4 of verse 6. Sometimes, these kinds of problems can be solved by re-writing the line, and sometimes by such simple things as taking a long line, and making it two lines!
Your language use...it is difficult for me, sometimes, to put poetic words together, so I can't imagine how hard it is, if English is not your native tongue. I have recently begun to learn Spanish, and have tried a couple of times to write Spanish poetry.
My Mexican friends cannot help but laugh at my efforts, and shake their heads.

I am not laughing at your effort. It is good, and will only get better, when you look it over, and edit it.

When editing, try to keep the rhythm as stable as you possibly can. In other words, look for places where you stumble as you read it, and edit those places. Also, Pay close attention to your words and sentences. Do they make sense? More importantly, will they make sense to others, to your audience?
But, do not be afraid to use the language as you think you need to; this is poetry, not technical writing! Nigerian poetry especially has a unique, complex structure and cadence that I suspect comes from local language influences, so do not be afraid of that!

Write poetry every day. Every single day. It is the only way to get better.

Always ask for RAW TRUTH when you post your work here. It is the only way to get strong, powerful answers that will, if you think about them, improve your poetry. I know that asking for raw truth can be difficult, especially when writing about emotional topics, but I also know that asking for the raw truth improved my poetry immeasurably.
Read poetry. Read the poetry on this site. Read the poetry of those who comment on and criticize your poems, and read the comments on each piece. It will show you what we are about here.

And read the poetry of Africa. It is wonderful. You are from Nigeria. This means that you have a huge, complex and incredibly excellent body of poetry to draw upon. I will only give you one example, the Nobel Laureate Wole Soyinka, whose work I constantly read, and whose excellence I aspire to. Try his poem "I think it rains", which in my humble opinion is superb.

I like your first effort, Olaniyi, and I wish to read more from you, starting with a serious edit of this piece.

Welcome to Neopoet! Keep writing; we are glad that you are here.

Welcome to Neopoet.

I perhaps felt the were a many more problems with rhythm or cadence (meter) than Jim referred to. Try reading it aloud, recording it and listening back, that helps me with my work.

I hope it helps you identify the cadence problems Jim refers to.

I would also stress never try too hard to rhyme, it is one of the least useful and most abused of all poetic tools.

https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/poems/life-and-privilege