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Learning

I yearn to learn,
so that I can earn,
knowledges so profound,
by the desirous ones found.

The yearning burns like a flame,
somewhat not to acquire fame,
but to be free from obscurity,
and be filled with legerity.

It hones one's ability
to savor rare dexterity .
Gives mastery over ignorance
to enhance one's significance

Profound erudition,
not an over night acquisition,
it comes from a sound learning,
prompted by a deep yearning.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I suppose part of poetry is to allow the poet to express universal ideas- The poet does not exist personally in the poem, rather deals with truths in a professorial way. I think as far as this subject is concerned, you have certainly touched on the aspects of learning (other than the great joy - you ascribe to it the power and social status gained by learning).
If this is your current approach to poetry, it is of course valid, and you should continue to express yourself in the way that's comfortable. But I would hope that you put some "I" in there so its less about universal truths and more about your relationship to these truths. This is the same with "Let Love Reign" and "let's give peace a chance". As i suggested then and still believe is that these type of poems work best sung as song lyrics. Poetry steps out a little more, and creates questions and contradictions, exists in a universe of itself, outside of of stated truths or propaganda.
The craft of your poem, the rhymes and meters are all sound and well done. I hope you continue to write, and can eventually approach the inner you to add some spice to the message,

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Thank you so much sir. I appreciate the comments sir.

author comment

though very differently expressed, that whichever one of us comments first leaves the other without much to say! [grins]

I would only add here that there seems to me a self-contradiction in the lines
"not to acquire fame,
but to be free from obscurity,"

I share your passion for endless, lifelong learning and agree with Eumulpos that you could express it more personally, perhaps take it as a challenge to treat the same subject with strong emotion and imagery.

cheers,
Jess
A new incentive for critique, description at
https://www.neopoet.com/community/news/proposal-encouraging-critiquescom...
discussion at
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/23390

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

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This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

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This is so helpful. Thank you so much sir ,I appreciate.

author comment

Not sure about
It burns though like a flame,
I really like the sound of
The yearning burns like a flame,

This is fine work.

cheers,
Jess
A new incentive for critique, description at
https://www.neopoet.com/community/news/proposal-encouraging-critiquescom...
discussion at
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/23390

Thank you so much Jess, I really appreciate I will consider the suggestion.

author comment

comments
but it seems ...by some techy error
your own thanks have been converted to BOWS .
I was very personal in composing poetry
when many found me self- centred
and yet you have been made to think of posting in an I.
I have an instructor in my house, who also so speaks
when I question him
he laughs at me

O man a PROFESSOR has to say some thing .
That was what Iearned in my life.

Coming to your wonderful poetry
it marvels me,
how many now read only Marwell's poetry
Great keep it up.
You roam about the fringes of fame
we all yearn for
and that is what's a poetic game,
let it flame....

It's so unfortunate there's no button available to delete such error.Thanks so much Lovedly for seeing my poem as wonderful. You are equally being read and I wish you all the fame you desire.

author comment

the flame for fame
has been now flamed as I move along the RIVER OF LIFE...
When I was young every day we heard so and so had a brother or new born sister so many also came along with bouquets as it was their young to arrive kids shower today..Now as I move along the river much faster every now and then hear of a natural disaster so and so has passed away its been the eighth news these past months away and every time one passes away I wonder if it's my coming day when I will not hear but know ahead of life's away Lovedly also has passed away But till then let my flame stay slowly smouldering away. Yes not to worry and they will still say No one will ever miss you I(we) say..
This poetry reveals an individual thought may be ,but it's universal still Could it not be

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