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this house

in what ways do you feel that you have made it safe to be in this house?
in what ways do you feel that you have made it safe to be honest in this house?
in what ways do you feel that you have made it safe to be vulnerable in this house?
in what ways do you feel that you have made it safe to be authentic in this house?

in what ways do you feel that you've made it safe to be Queer in this house?

because, mom, i'm living in fear in this house ​
shaking and choking whenever you’re near in this house
biting my tongue and stifling my tears in this house
i’m clutching a polaroid to my chest, dear, in this house

because I’m in love with the person in it
and i don’t love you here, i don’t want to be in it

it’s not a home here, mom
i didn’t ask to go here, mom
i’ve been perfect and helpful and then some here, mom
you told me to ask for what i want here, mom

you think you’re an ally in this house
you think you’ve got it figured out in this house
‘if we all just listen to each other in This House we’ll find peace and eliminate oppression in this house’
but i can’t agree with you, i can’t listen to the people telling me i don’t have worth in this house

i can’t respect the people who disrespect my existence
you need to expect and encourage my bi+trans resistance

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
k, so I wrote this in 10 minutes of rage; it is far from complete
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

I will come back to this one later...`Geezer.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

The first five lines look like a questionnaire.
I would suggest that you make a couple of changes
to make it look/sound like a letter to your Mother.

Delete the [In what ways do you think have made it safe?]

How about if you make it a statement like:
I don't think it is safe to be in this house
I cannot be honest
I cannot be authentic
I cannot be vulnerable
I cannot be Queer...

Don't be afraid to make changes.
I see a lot of potential in this and a powerful message waiting to be told!
A lot of times, I see poems that have a great deal to say
but are left hanging because, the author makes the few changes
that someone suggests and then stops there, figuring that is it.
I don't want to rewrite your whole poem for you.
However, I will work with you and help you polish it until you are satisfied.

~ Geezer.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

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