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A Heliocentric Howl

man in the moon
or man on the moon

like howling wolves
or waves
that break
dance

we’ve caught the lunacy
of an out of this world dream

the rock and roll
of rocket fuel

an inner space
suited
to fit the size
of the universe's outer
breadth

we will put our
star dust
boot print
on planets and satellites
far beyond
our regular reach

sing solar system songs

and meet its resounding silence
with a sacred
solitude

celebrate
our collective cerebellum
with the power
of one thousand
exploding suns

exchange our neuroses
our psychosis

for a new cosmos
a new cosmogony

an updated psychology
an ever enduring pansophy

though we are but
a moonflower
that blossoms
one night a year

we will overcome
our darkened fear

and shine
with reflected smiles

a million light years
on

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Comments

There are some really stellar lines (to use pun) and great ideas in the body of the poem. really strong finish. The first 3 stanza's are for me not at all in keeping with the force of the imagery and stance in the poem- the play of words (in or on the moon), the wolves and waves...the lunacy are for me putting us in the direction of word play and cuteness, whereas these lines are so meaningful and well done:

we will put our
star dust
boot print
on planets and satellites
far beyond
our regular reach

sing solar system songs

and meet its resounding silence
with a sacred
solitude

There is a very nice poetic mood at a good cadence. Nice!

Just on the aside- A national science group posted that after an exhaustive study 24% of the USA cannot answer for sure if the earth orbits the sun or the sun orbits the earth. They are heliocentric. (Probably also Trump supporters). Blame the education system or whatever, it is a shocking statistic.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

not just well written but good ideas.

Love the stanza-
"celebrate
our collective cerebellum
with the power
of one thousand
exploding suns"

There have been human genii whose brains have the power of a thousand exploding suns but alone we are just smart apes.

Just one crit. The word 'howl' has been virtually owned by Ginsberg. Not necessary but could you find an alternative without detracting?

cheers,
Jess
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Love the poem, but I fear for the universe. If we can't respect our own planet what chance the others. Regards Roscoe.

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

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