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FUCK YOU, father

I bet you think you won
with me locked up in this cage
and perhaps you did...
in your own fucked up way
but this isn't about you anymore
you are just going to have to learn
hatred is a strong word
far stronger
than you will ever be

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

R U fucking?

Thanks for stopping by

Scott

author comment

the title and the language used are stronger than any comment, but I thought it suited well what you inended and the feeling of rage the author has.
No suggestions

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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I know you every word used is intended.
Don't you think "damn" would do instead of "f***"
Just a thought.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

In the title or the poem?

Thanks

Scott

author comment

If this were mine, I wouldn't use the f*** word at all neither in the title, nor in the body of the poem. However, the fact that I and you have a totally different religious and cultural backgrounds I thought you might have a different point of view of the word.
Just thought I'd mention it anyway.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

For me, it's about maximizing emotion. Damned, he already is, unless you ask him, of course.

Thanks

Scott

author comment

of course dear Scott

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

As you know I am fond of the use of profanities and never refrain from using them when I think it is the right word.
What struck me in this dialogue that once, during a discussion with a religious person who I knew disliked strong language out of respect I said 'damn' instead of 'fuck' and it instantly ended the friendship. To her it was the most repulsive thing I could have said!

Also once at Christmas with some Irish in-laws who constantly said 'fecking this' or 'fecking that' etc I got in trouble for saying 'fucking'. To me it was the purest hypocrisy and stupidity.

I have a far vaster vocabulary than most English speakers and use every word as I see fit.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

that one wasn't me, or was it?

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

though I imagine the same word might offend you, I wouldn't use it in conversation with you though I wouldn't hesitate to use it in a poem.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

language / word usage consistent with the theme emoting strong resentment...if I read this right Scott..

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Yes sir. Thanks for taking the time.

Scott

author comment

under the thumb...
I was very critical...when I should have been caring and listening
because I did not mature proper...I was a bitter brew to those
now I get it....when its been past....I had to go out...see
and wear the other shoes to know...but now I see
or feel it....But I watched and knew those that sizzled with the
hurt rage and indifference to their children....their competition
in a lot of regards and images of the mother they loved and
hated.....(I shall stay null on this regarding my personal story)

my father was good....but we knocked heads...I did tell him
where it was at once and he was shocked..
"thats the way it is eh!" and then he promptly hung up
on me when I stood my ground on some simple..(to me)
item.....forever after he was just close to my brother and
sister.
I felt greatly relieved but I feared facing him....I have met
others whom have had their story and have rights to tell
their parents where to go...its cathartic and reasonable

I like how this poem went....I read THE WALRUS and NEW
YORKER for its fiction....the people I chummed with used
F ..... .... and they meant it....

a short and concise poem
that hits the nerve succintly

thank U !

Thank you sir. Always good to hear from you.

Scott

author comment

brings the story to it's logical conclusion. The words can't be anymore forceful, because they have no where left to go. I guess that was how you intended it. Not sure if you could have done better. ~ Gee.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I believe I can always do better. If not, it would be time to put the pen down and move on to another challenge. I guess that's the beauty of poetry. It will never run out of ink.

Scott

author comment

Having spent about an hour with others discussing the "F" word in the Mayflower in Ottawa the lady/woman who lead the discussion was saying that the word is part of the everyday language now, and should be accepted.
Well everyone to their own way of talking, I myself find the word used to emphasize something or make a point is just lazy and mind less, there are far better words that can be used, but I am old fashioned lol.
Your write lost a lot in its severity and as I said the "F" word is lazy, he must deserve a worse description than just "F".
Yours as always Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

I've been called a lot of things in my life, including the F word, but never lazy.

First and foremost, cursing is defined in the bible as speaking ill of anyone. Therefore no matter what language I use, I have cursed him by portraying him in a negative light. It is a sin either way if you believe in that sort of thing.

Second, the F word had been around since the 1800's. It has many different uses as you can see below

Fuck
From "Monty Python"

Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the english language today, is the word fuck. Out of all the english words that begin with the letter 'f' ...fuck is the only word refered to as 'the f word... It's the one magical word. Just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as most words in the english language is derived from german ...the word fuieken, which means to strike.
In english, fuck falls into many grammatical categories:

As a transitive verb for intance ...John fucked Shirley.
As an intransitive verb...Shirley fucks.

Its meaning is not always sexual, it can be used as...

An adjective such as ...John's doing all the fucking work.
As part of an adverb ...Shirley talks too fucking much.
As an adverb enhancing an adjective ...Shirley is fucking beautiful.
As a noun ...I don't give a fuck.
As part of a word ...absofuckinglutely -or- infuckingcredible.
And as almost every word in a sentence ...Fuck the fucking fuckers.

As you must realize, there aren't too many words with the versatility of fuck...such as these examples describing situations such as:

Fraud ...I got fucked at the used car lot.
Dismay ...ahhh fuck it.
Trouble ...I guess I'm really fucked now.
Agression ...Don't fuck with me buddy.
Difficulty ...I don't understand this fucking question.
Inquiry ...Who the fuck was that?
Dissatisfaction ...I don't like what the fuck is going on here.
Incompetance ...He's a fuck-off.
Dismissal ...Why don't you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself...

I'm sure you can think of many more examples.
With all these multi-purpose applications, how can anyone be offended when you use the word. We say use this unique, flexible word more often in your daily speech.
It will identify the quality of your character immediately.
Say it loudly and proudly...
...FUCK YOU!
----------------------------------- (end)----------------------

Third, the words usage in literature became prominent in the 1950's and 60's. Don't take my word for it. You can Google F in literature and see for yourself. I even own a book call F*ck Feelings that was published just last year. It's a great read. You should check it out. In fact, you may need it after reading this.

F ourth, and this is just my opinion, I can't understand why societies have placed such a huge stigma on this particular slang. But since they have, it has created a greater emphasis on it's use which allows writers to use it in circumstances where they truly wish to drive a point home. It gets people's attention! Just as it got yours. I could have written "Curse You, father" but then I would have sounded like a sniveling old hag. I meant it. I wrote it and I'm not taking it back. I will happily review any technical merits of the poem with you. Langston Hughes was heavily criticized for writing as black southern folk spoke. Why? Because society viewed it as ignorant. But how else was he going to capture the true ambience of the plight that he chose to write about? Turned out pretty well for him in the long run.

Doubt that any of this will change your mind, but I felt a need to clarify my form of communication. You should know that I've had a college level vocabulary since I was twelve or thirteen year s old. So, in other words, "you fucked with the wrong poet." Question to you is, will you still respect me in the morning?

Thanks,

Scott

author comment

This is near the same discussion we had in the Mayflower in Ottawa those years ago, The reason I say it is a lazy way of speaking, is that it has now become a substitute for many words.
Also a word that has a distinct meaning, and it is now used for subjects not related to the actual meaning.
A great subject to discuss though..
Your meaning and point was good and in this day and age the word use was adequate, the purpose was clear.
Not to worry I have read up on this subject many times and I must accept that the word use is now common place, your use was not lazy it had meaning.
Thanks for your full blooded reply, lol,
Yours as always Ian ..Always with respect..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

You fucking dry old cunt.
hmmm, maybe you're right in some of it's usage however it is often the best possible word in context and I think this poem is one of them.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Your first few words cracked me up, lol
Yes I agree that in this context the words were OK, just trying to find some stronger, but the old Anglo Saxon speak is the best there is.
Not knowing Shakespeare's works does he use hard words to describe anyone ???
Thanks for your input, great word to talk about, don't tell anyone but I have been known to use it and then others know that I really mean what I say, lol.
So fuck off you ole bystander and leave me be..
Loves you as always Yours Ian..

"F O"
Fusion of an act with a statement
Useful when putting a point across
Concentrated anger hopefully walking away
Kind words to those that don’t listen

Often used when speed is of the essence
Friendly advice before conflict ensues,
Found an explicit word to tell you how I feel..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

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