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Fly From The Sky In July (July Contest)

Fly From The Sky In July
With a big dump of snow
Frozen waves grow
Curling over like an ocean breaker

But still
Deadly
Quite Still
Called a cornice

Quite enormous
No visible harness
An avalanche before it launches,
Itself earthward

So me and Jase,
Eighteen and invincible
Would climb to the top,
edge to the edge of the edge of the cornice

till the world fell away
and we skied sky, snow and adrenaline
And did not die.
Fuck knows why.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Adrenaline, pure pleasure to an adolescent.
Editing stage: 
Contest: 

Comments

The first time ever I've entered a poetry contest.

The guidelines stipulated pentameter but not what sort (Iambic , Trochaic , Spondaic , Anapestic , Dactylic , Amphibrachic , Pyrrhic ? What?) so I ignored that and stuck with quatrains.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

It didn't hurt a bit to enter did it? lol. Best of luck in contest

My anarchist mates blew up my house.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

A pentameter is noithing by itself without a meter so I gnored that and quatrains are simply verses in four lines.
Hope it doesn't count against me that I'm an arrogant knw-it-all bastard. I do.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

a blast! Adrenaline! I wonder about the people that you meet in life; that have no emotions; the ones that wouldn't cry out in joy or terror, no matter what and have no interest in doing anything even slightly out of the box; just for the sake of adrenaline! Ahhhhhh, Nice job, in bringing a little breathlessness to your poem! ~ Gee.
.

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ta mate. glad it worked for you.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment
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