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Engine breaking

Trucks are engine breaking

down the hill-highway, they groan

like startled crows

they low

rev

hum

caw

and growl

Inside each lonely distant cab

a lantern blue leadlight glows

illuminating

the furrowed forehead

and a tired heart growing hungry

for something to end.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
It's been a while. A quiet observation from an ear above the city. Hoping to be back soon.
Editing stage: 

Comments

There are those out there, that are weary of the daily grind and the seemingly thankless job, but we hope that they are heartened by the thankfulness of an entire country. Hopefully, they will get a break soon. I like the single words, it makes it seem like hearing it from a great distance above. Nice. ~ Geezer.
.

Honest critique and comments shouldn't hurt.
It's why we are here, to get better at our craft.

I used the short words, as that is the sound of a large truck in the distance engine breaking down the hill in the dark. The accountants and office workers isolate inside, the truckies keep on moving the goods that they need to survive. It was almost like listening to a great groaning and withering animal, or bird, hence the caw. I wanted to link the experience of these great unsung midnight heroes to something animalistic that's there in the night, whilst (some) are sleeping. I think I'll build on this theme, and write more about them.
I'm no hero, but they gave me ISO lite! I work from home, but still have to jump into the magic fix anything with a network cable in it, almost every day, in some of the filthiest locations, so I think, after all the TV ads with their applauding, there is something deeper to address in the inequities of the class system, service class, professional class, that's been starkly thrown into view during this crisis.

Cheers.

Chris.

Chris Hall - Tasmania

Grossbooted draymen rolled barrels dullthudding out of Prince's stores and bumped them up on the brewery float. On the brewery float bumped dullthudding barrels rolled by grossbooted draymen out of Prince's stores.

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