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Did You Ever Think That Maybe, Just MAYBE, You Actually Make Me Happy?
you are sunlight on ice.
the cold slowly melts away from me
and warmth is all that's left
you are blue sky
through charred and blackened clouds
despite thick layers of pollution you are brilliant.
Last few words:
for pumpkin
there are (almost) no words.
Editing stage:
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Comments
Roscoe Lane
Sat, 2014-12-13 04:29
Lucky pumpkin
Lucky pumpkin that someone writes these lovely lines. I personally would remove the ands from both verses. Love Roscoe...
Roscoe Llane,
Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.
raj
Sat, 2014-12-13 13:42
Good expressive write. Would
Good expressive write. Would lift it further if the last two lines are tweaked up.
Regards,
raj (sublime_ocean)
wesley snow
Sun, 2014-12-14 13:40
I rather like the last line.
Strangely, some of the most beautiful sunsets are due to them being refracted through toxic chemicals.
Beautiful poem.
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
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Esker
Tue, 2014-12-16 01:53
nothing like the weather!
Poem makes me happy
a realistic scene!
got out a lot years ago
and realize that there
is much out there!
including the inner
and the old clouds!
Thank You!
emogothgirl
Sat, 2014-12-20 12:42
Thanks guys!
you have inspired some itty bitty edits. alas, what else can you do with an itty bity poem :)
thanks for the read,
Mag