Trust now you've retired as a school teacher
who looked to me like a grammar preacher
kids just told me dad it's Intl grammar day
so sending to you these greetings today

i'm always flustered by all those crooked laws
why use those commas forcing one to pause
folks would exclaim when surprised or in pain
why show them where they ought to exclaim

I hope you're patient with kiddies at your home
not punctuating habits but letting them roam
it doesn't matter really if it's knife or just nife
grammar can killjoy use of slang in their life

times have kept changing in this fast paced life
yesterday's girl friend soon becomes a wife
so why use those tenses to define what is past
when today what's present ends up pretty fast

I remember your lesson about use of adjectives
made me coin for you some choicest expletives
if I'd shown them you would throw me outta school
but i was that wise crack and not a stupid fool

pages of my note book are full of funny scriptures
if you see them now even you would be in raptures
some captions below said what they were all about
like "Madam Hitler - though a wee bit too stout"

some keys on my board are now past their prime
like those comas and colons have faded over time
I know this letter makes no grammatical sense
but this ain't no any test so me not at all tense

please accept these greetings from your past student
if i have erred somewhere don't think me as imprudent

respectfully yours,