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Code Blue

too close to the forest to see the trees
to cross the I's and dot the T's
better forget the edit
and call the medic

prep and get him in a gown
going to have to remove a noun
and maybe put in a verb
if it fails, it's out to the curb

It's a dire situation
can't find any punctuation
the spelling and bad grammar
throw this writer in the slammer

the right diagnose is slim
the prognoses is grim
FLAT LINE OOPS! I hit delete
OH! well, nurse, let's eat

Dr Stan, Dr Stan CODE BLUE
EMERGENCY EDIT CODE BLUE

must be another one of that hippiepoet
he's no Longfellow and he doesn't know it
hurry let's slip out the side exit
turn off your phone before they text it

Dr Stan CODE BLUE Dr Stan CODE BLUE
DR STAN WHERE ARE YOU

my treat Chinese, Mexican or Italian

DISCLAIMER: All characters in this story are fictional. Any resemblance to real characters on Neopoet are purely intentional. No poets were hurt in the writting of this story

copyright 12-6-10 huey horton (hippiepoet69)

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I don't think Dr. Stan can fix this old hippies writting. Sometimes my spelling is so bad. Even spell check don't know what I'm trying to spell. But I know I am smarter than this computer. Because I can mispell more words than it knows. And the older I get. The less words I can spell. Take Care. huey

author comment

where are you?

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

I love the wit and humour! Made me smile - it's a great poem, Stan's going to love it!

Love Mand xxxx

No way I'm gonna make any suggestions on this one! A good doctor knows when to leave well enough alone lmao.......stan

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