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Cellar Door

Cellar Door

Cellar door
Matador
Spanish bullshit
Crap

Toilet bowl
Scummy rim
Dirty meaning
Stop!

Start again
Repeat the name
Cellar door
Once more

Cellar door
Cellar door
cellophane
And pain

Lock me in
Shoot the bolt
Down the stairs
Again

Red cape
Flies
Planes above
Looking through the
Crack
Cellar light
Burning bright
Shouting out the
Night

Cellar door
Open up
Let the breath come
Back
Up the flight
Hold the rail
Skin is pale and
Damp

Cellar tomb
Its my room
Weird and wonder
Lust
Secrets stay
Where they
Lay
Cellar door
Shuts
Tight

Editing stage: 

Comments

you got this in one! Nice work! Of course, I'm new to this type of works, so I will let my esteemed partner and the thinker-upper of this workshop, give the verdict, but I think you nailed the parameters perfectly! ~ Geezer.
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Please acknowledge critique and comments.
They are a vital part of our community!
Critique or comment today!

Not sure if I properly submitted it to the workshop though, do I have to do anything else?

And thanks for your comment - it was a new thing for me but fun!! Turned a bit weird, but hey, you never know what is going to come out once you start these things!

author comment

near the bottom of the page you will see
Workshop
-none-
click on that and you will see
Open to new participants - Cellar Door
click on that then save and your poem will be submitted to the workshop,
ok?

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

Sorry to be dim, but the bottom of what page, as I cant see what you said?!

Thanks!

Lindsay

author comment

and I can show you by screen shots.
or phone me I'm also in Sydney and can guide you through it.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

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