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At Arm's Length

Without absorbing too much time
I've a mindset way, too stuck;

I've seen reality bite much, harder
than it's second cousin, "luck".

I've seen pagans stop, and pause to pray
wishing the day was gone, and done;

myself, I'd merely float high in the sky
where I'd burn forever, in your "sun".

Plus, I wouldn't have it any other way
it's all good, it just plain, must be;

for, I'd spend forever and a day
if you'd please save the last dance, for me.

I'm but a slave to my emotions
though, for this life I'd never crave;

were it not for how I feel about you
I'd have no trouble, trying to behave!

So, when this "gig" is finally, over
and we disperse, independantly;

you're heart will see my right hand out
so, save that last dance....for me!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I should say i loved this poem. It kept bouncing off from beginning to end, with just a few hitches, but I'm sure the others can help iron stuff out.

I thought a little typo got through there: Independently.

A great short poem. But can you help me out with the title? I'm having a bit of a difficulty relating it to the poem.

Thanks.

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

...about my title; it has to do with, asking one to dance with you, or shaking one's hand....you're always at an "arm's length"...from the individual. Ya know?
At any rate, I greatly appreciate your taking the time to both read, AND commenting. Thanx, soo very much.
Sincerely,
docmaverick.

Neopoet is "newtriffic" !
...from the heart, or a reasonable faxcimile;
david a. goodwin #{:>{)} @==

author comment

for helping out with that *raises hat to you*

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

...are indeed, quite welcome.
doc.

Neopoet is "newtriffic" !
...from the heart, or a reasonable faxcimile;
david a. goodwin #{:>{)} @==

author comment
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