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Aged works

Being Seventy two
I am in a right stew
As all the girls are far too young
To talk of love
I would appear to be a bum.

I enjoy all their lives
As I move slowly around
They are like rose petals
Scattered on the ground

Being of a spiritual leaning
Their energy and feeling
Would blow my lights out
if I were to run about
Seeming not to touch the ground

I love having them around
There is such a flow of energy
I could sit in the dark
And become a misery
But old age is too long

I refuse to sit too long
Looking blank, nothing going on
Look at a new baby
Grab at the gurgling joy
See the love there girl or boy

I would rather wait outside
In this they call the golden days
To meet the maker, well not a craze
I know that it could be soon

Life to me like a hot air balloon
You have to work at it to make it fly
Just hot air I hear you say
Shit you make me cry

Off we go into the air
Enjoy each moment without a care
We never worry when
It’s time to touch the ground
Let’s enjoy the sights and quiet sounds.

I can’t hear you whine from up here
Green Earth below and lots of fresh air
One day I hope that whatever
I will float off into the sky
On air or whatever, we all die

I embrace the now don’t you see
To carry those that cared for me
It is like a bond we have
We are a part of their eternity
Let us make it perfect you and me.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
So many of us here are either old or sick, always remember that it is your own love that runs your soul.
Editing stage: 


Even though this is a free verse I can see some on and off rhyming here and there and I wonder if it is done deliberately. Perhaps old age feels too long because you get tired of the aches that comes with it. lol. Sorry I know I shouldn't be laughing. Its no joking matter. I will feel them too when the time comes and from the way things are going it might be sooner than later. Take care my friend. Keep on writing.


I was tired of some of the poets bemoaning their fates and complaining about things so much, age being one, shit happens and age is unstoppable lol.
More of a fun piece really, but we have some poets here that are very ill and they don't seem to complain all the time, sorry to those that do complain but I draw a line sometimes.
I know that you my friend are looking after one that is ill and you write about other things.
Thanks for dropping by I will bring a glass of chaii, that your Spirits will be lifted so, with strength from those that you use to know and are only a thought away.
Yours ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

Good advice for any age. I appreciated this poem - light, airy, good message. It reminds me of a stanza of an Anna Swir poem:

was invented by those
who live briefly
as a burst of laughter.
(from The Sea and the Man)

I remember coming out of an awful period and being left with the indelible feeling "If this couldn't destroy my ability to love, nothing can." And I hold on to that through every dark period that has occurred since so I also appreciate your last few words. Thanks - good to have a reminder.

Thank you for your comment and the guide to another of our great writers.
It is kinda sad that you are troubled about loving, it is a thing that starts from deep inside yourself and is allowed to flow outward, imagine the most beautiful crystal clear spring of cool water in that inner feelings of you, it can be released by many things but once it is, it babbles and flows outward for all time, it is fed by something just past your inner self very close to an inner infinity.
Go well step out of troubled waters and find your own..
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

at 72 wow you miss out on life
I know guy's whose at 90 does rise
and then its no surprise
gals sling around the lonesome prize
and the guys willingly does rise

you at 72 and some bard at 27
must exchange once in a way
what games at those differential stages both play
then you will be as gay
as they they
but of now adays
you of olden
and then behold
you will surely say
you had a full length of life
and in your own way

those guys have themselves to lay
as they want others with them to play
and give them a raise

many women bosses love praise
they remain single now a days
so be back at 72
you have had a hell of a life
with more than many a wife
they many guys yet strive


Behave yourself, My life has been and still is very good.
One day we will compare notes lol,
Go well young Bard, Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

stanzas 2 and 4, especially the rose petals on the ground and the idea that old age is long (which I hope is true in a way).
Best wishes,

It is that when you are older your youth seems to shrink into pockets of memories.
If only we had total recall as it were then all our days would be more precious to us, but this will come when in a distance we have to answer for all the things we have ever done, in our beliefs we have to judge ourselves, but that is another story.
Thanks for your visit it is most welcome, Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment
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