I'm not sure if we've met! Nice to read from you! I'm Kelsey and I've been a member of the site for quite a while, but I've been absent for a long time due to university.

The opening lines of your poem remind me of Edgar Allan Poe's "Annabelle Lee," which I love. When my grandmother was in school it was a poem she had to memorize, and it has been her favorite ever since. She told me about it when she saw that I was learning about Poe in high school. I've loved his poetry even more when I learned that she enjoyed it too. She passed down a very old anthology of Poe's writing to me. It's a collection of five or six books and they are over 100 years old, published in 1903! I'm so moved by the repeated image of the "kingdom by the sea" that often my "about me" section on any given website is that I live in a swampland by the sea, which is accurate for my neck of the woods!

I also enjoyed this poem because it reminds me of epic poetry with your story of the honorable knight and medieval adventures. I love poetry that tells a story. May I ask what form it is supposed to be? I can see that there is a set rhyme scheme, but perhaps there is also a poetic form here that I would love to learn about.

If I could make two small suggestions:

"though others went to far for glory" --> "though others went too far for glory"

Also, I think because your rhymes are so precise and advanced, often multi-syllable words, the near rhyme of "father" and "gather" doesn't quite fit for me. I like the imagery there, and even the word creation of sorts of "in-gather." It reminds me of German, which makes a new word by combining a verb and its preposition a lot, so instead of saying "let's gather in the cafe", it could very well be "let's ingather at the cafe," just like you have in the poem! A real example from German is aufkommen, which means to come up or arise, but the literal translation is up-come. 

Because I do like the use of "in-gather," I'll try to give you a possible suggestion that keeps that and adjusts "father." 

Maybe "til then the husband, so proud, rather

would the sweetest love in-gather"

I'm not the best at rhyming and our available perfect-rhymes with gather are very limited. I have to rely on a website called Rhyme Zone (www.rhymezone.com) to find my rhymes, but it's also good for a dictionary and thesaurus. Maybe this adjustment alters the intention of those lines too much, or it may be too forced, but hopefully it will spur an idea in you anywayl. I thought "rather" might be good to signify that the father is so proud of his family that he would rather wait for his daughter's happy and love-filled future than go off for deadly glory. 

Take care,

Kelsey