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The act of walking (a prose poem in parts)

The act of walking.

1. Barrack and Melville Street

Buoyant and flinging off the clinging vestments of town, heart pounding and now top head throbbing bobbing up the hill burning thighs afire, forced to wait at traffic lights, then still, then onward past that place -hello gorgeous and breathing so heavy that it betrays a death rattle, the battle of wounded lung, spun phlegm and coughing up he goes, panting and palpitating - bugger the top too far.Near as damn it as near as I'll get.

Summit. Of sorts, a victory for the tragically semi-fit, nearly resulting in a seizure - then begins the recovery of plodding and juddering d-o-w-n - hips are not the same as shock absorbents - something sprung, shot clattering wreckage and neither are they hip, slowly resolving burning lungs to cool. Feigning casual fitness as the passers-by passing by, lithe and flexible things, one smiles, out of pity, or paternal recognition, who knows? Onward, slowly gaining composure

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Last few words: 
I've been away from this site for a while - life gets in the way of Poetry again :) - just trying something new.
Editing stage: 


Good to see you back, loved this write, a lot of us are busy not only with the workshops but as you with life.
I hope life is good for you and that you will have space for a few writes.
Quite a few poets just drift in for a while and then off they go, it is a pity we haven't a notice board for letting us know these things.
Anyway good to have you back,
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thanks Ian, I'll always feel a certain loyalty to this site, it was the first forum I used online, for poetry anywhere. Ive been scribbling and chipping away for years, in note books, but hadnt committed anything much online and this site has always made me feel welcome.
You are correct, life does get in the way! Poetry being a passion, therapy and many other things besides, will always be given time here.

Thanks for your kind words again, hope to complete this mini odyssey of Hobart, and to commit some time to reading/commenting on other's work constructively, which is the whole point in the end isnt it?

Take care,


Chris Hall - Tasmania

Grossbooted draymen rolled barrels dullthudding out of Prince's stores and bumped them up on the brewery float. On the brewery float bumped dullthudding barrels rolled by grossbooted draymen out of Prince's stores.

author comment

Creativity is pretty often the basis / tonic for art forms and so is innovation. I was hoping to read in "the last few words" why you classify this as prose-poetry, which would let readers like me to know this form. Though life does get in the way which limits your art, I believe your being in the close proximity to nature would keep you inspired to post more because just like a river finds its way through difficult terrains so would your creativity instincts, isn't that so?


raj (sublime_ocean)

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